Imasara desu ga, Osananajimi wo Suki ni Natte Shimaimashita - Ch. 40 - Gears Setting Chaos In Motion

[story645]

Yuu has been trying to deepen the relationship with Yami, but Yami refuse to let him in.

Yuu could have pushed, could have gone "nope, not doing this, we need to talk, wtf is with the lying?". That's what Hikari did when she could've just accepted his confession and tried to bury her feelings (which likely would have ended up w/ her unloading on him like Aya did here).

ETA: but, also, if Yuu had the emotional maturity to do that, this would be a very different manga.

 

[Alzu]

Yuu could have pushed, could have gone "nope, not doing this, we need to talk, wtf is with the lying?". That's what Hikari did when she could've just accepted his confession and tried to bury her feelings (which likely would have ended up w/ her unloading on him like Aya did here).

Yuu tried to push back, and Yami push back more. Yuu also knows that she has a troubled homelife and didn't want to force her into something she didn't want to do.

Yuu also could've just done more to show he cared: planned more dates - all we see is a kinda half assed "you don't like crowds, wanna go to an internet cafe to see fireworks",

First, Yuu wanted to do more than just stay in the internet cafe all day, it was Yami who insisted on staying on the internet cafe despite him wanting to go somewhere else, saying "It's not every day they go on dates."

As for the internet cafe for the fireworks, I believe you're being disingenuous with him. He tried contacting Yami earlier before to see the fireworks in-person, but Yami never answered his calls nor his texts, so him offering to see the fireworks in a cafe was a hail mary from him.

he could've initiated the physical stuff even once - she's always doing the hugging/cuddling/kissing, could've introduced her to Hikari to show how over the moon he is about her and that he's really over Hikari, etc - basically the entire Yuu/Aya arc, all we see is him going w/ her flow.

While I agree with you about Yuu needing to initiate physical intimacy, Yuu also didn't want their entire relationship about physical stuff. Which is why he wanted to do more traditional couple stuff than, you know, nonstop sex. Yuu showing off Yami to Hikari is weird as fuck, given that they were in a secret relationship. Neither of their parents know they were in a relationship to begin with. So, I don't know why you would think he would do that.

 

[story645]

Yuu tried to push back, and Yami push back more. Yuu also knows that she has a troubled homelife and didn't want to force her into something she didn't want to do.

And Yuu could have pushed harder, like Hikari did. Yuu chose to stop the line of questioning, which is why Aya thinks he just didn't care that much b/c Aya keeps pushing even when it makes Yuu twitchy. Like yeah, he was probably trying to give her space but she's not a mind reader so he should have communicated that. But again I don't actually expect children to have the maturity or communication skills to navigate "I want you to open up to me but am giving you the space to do it in your own time".

First, Yuu wanted to do more than just stay in the internet cafe all day,

Yes wanted so much he had 0 suggestions for what to do instead. Not even an amusement park/aquarium/zoo/standard issue manga date event.

As for the internet cafe for the fireworks, I believe you're being disingenuous with him. He tried contacting Yami earlier before to see the fireworks in-person, but Yami never answered his calls nor his texts, so him offering to see the fireworks in a cafe was a hail mary from him.

Um, I don't think "he only tried to accommodate her after she didn't respond to his initial ask to do something he acknowledges isn't her speed" is making the point that he's trying to show he cares about her.

Like showing care would be including the accomodation in the initial ask or doing the research to find a less populated spot (& telling her), which broken record here I acknowledge that learning to accommodate people comes w/ experience & maturity.

Which is why he wanted to do more traditional couple stuff than, you know, nonstop sex.

He says he wanted to but went w/ Aya's flow of making out at the cafe or staying in the hotel room. Again, he had agency and from Aya's POV could have said "nope, we're going outside now" if it was that important to him Pretty sure his POV was that he believed Aya when she said it was all great and wonderful b/c he did not have the maturity/experience to pick up on what she wasn't saying.

Yuu showing off Yami to Hikari is weird as fuck, given that they were in a secret relationship

Far as I remember they never discussed that they wanted to keep the relationship secret given that Aya explicitly flags him lying to his parents. To me that's weird to point out of if they've both agreed that they want this relationship to be secret.

He'd introduce Aya to Hikari for the same reason Hikari wanted to bring Yuu to her festival - to introduce the person they like to their other important people and share more of their world with their important person. Would also show that he's not worried if it sinks his chances with Hikari.

Granted, I figure that if Aya had asked to meet Hikari he probably would have agreed & this is more of him being unsure of where the relationship stood, partly b/c of how Aya was playing it. But again he has agency and could have pushed Aya to clarify where she stood and it was a choice they both individually made to not have the big messy discussions.

Broken record here of I'm not judging inexperienced kids for being bad at difficult conversations, mostly just think that the manga is doing a pretty good job of showing the fallout.

 

[biologist]

I don't know about you guys but I will place my bet on real life people acting more dumb than these three if this kind of situation happens in real life.

 

[GennArc]

First, Yuu wanted to do more than just stay in the internet cafe all day, it was Yami who insisted on staying on the internet cafe despite him wanting to go somewhere else, saying "It's not every day they go on dates."

While I agree with you about Yuu needing to initiate physical intimacy, Yuu also didn't want their entire relationship about physical stuff. Which is why he wanted to do more traditional couple stuff than, you know, nonstop sex.

Yes wanted so much he had 0 suggestions for what to do instead. Not even an amusement park/aquarium/zoo/standard issue manga date event.

I know this was brought up in context of "he could've organized more dates", but I think you're both misinterpreting that scene in the cafe. It was not about "Yuu wants to do normal couple stuff, but Yami wants to stay cooped up (and do physical stuff)". It was about Yuu thinking she might be bored and proposing to do something, and Yami thinking how he doesn't understand the extent of her feelings, that just being together with him is all she needs.

"Hey, uh, Yami-senpai? What do you want to do after this? Wanna go somewhere?"
"Do you want to go somewhere, Yuu?"
"Nah, I just thought... I mean, it's a date, and we're spending it cooped up like this. That okay with you?"
"...What's wrong with staying in?"
"Well, it's not exactly healthy..."

He doesn't get it.
Yuu really doesn't get it.

What I want from him.
What he's giving me.
How irreplaceable it is.

No stress, no worries. Nothing unpleasant or tiring. Just pure fun.
Being with someone I like, feeling their warmth, taking in their scent, having them all to myself.

And it's more or less a consistent theme - Yuu not realizing how strong her feelings are, and Yami not being able to express them.

 

[calebweathers]

I haven't read anything else aside from the last 4 chapters out of curiosity but damn i feel the pain

Don’t feel sorry for black haired girl, she isn’t worth it imo I really like her character but my annoyance outweighs my empathy

 

[Niro]

SOMEONE PICK UP THE DAMN PHONE

I CALLED IT WHEN THIS FIRST STARTED: YUU IS INNOCENT

 

[story645]

It was about Yuu thinking she might be bored and proposing to do something, and Yami thinking how he doesn't understand the extent of her feelings, that just being together with him is all she needs.

Yes I'm biased cause I've argued this the whole time, but very much I think this chapter is her saying that being together wasn't all she needed - she also needed him to occasionally push against the flow and "do something" to show he cared.

She's specifically here thinking about the family stuff & thinking he should have pushed harder, and I read her wanting him to take action after the ghosting as the ghosting was a test he failed. And if she's testing his feelings, it's b/c she's already feeling unloved.

ETA: though admittedly (& I've said this before), at the time of the manga cafe she could've honestly thought just being together was enough b/c they hadn't been together long enough for her to build up much resentment.

 

[GennArc]

Yes I'm biased cause I've argued this the whole time, but very much I think this chapter is her saying that being together wasn't all she needed - she also needed him to occasionally push against the flow and "do something" to show he cared.

She's specifically here thinking about the family stuff & thinking he should have pushed harder, and I read her wanting him to take action after the ghosting as the ghosting was a test he failed. And if she's testing his feelings, it's b/c she's already feeling unloved.

ETA: though admittedly (& I've said this before), at the time of the manga cafe she could've honestly thought just being together was enough b/c they hadn't been together long enough for her to build up much resentment.

Without going back to that discussion, I guess what I wanted to say is that she wanted him to see through her mask

Spoiler

and see this

Spoiler

instead of just accepting the former despite having suspicions that is not who she is.

 

[story645]

I guess what I wanted to say is that she wanted him to see through her mask

Yeah, I mostly see it as a what and how - taking action is how she wants (expects?) him to demonstrate that he recognizes that she wants more than she's saying/showing.

 

[middle-the-nerd]

thx for finding the answer for me, appreciate it

no i get ur reasonings, and i'm not the type of person to be like "i hope yuu's life is ruined" and all that jazz, its just that with how yuu just wants to half-ass everything, i just don't believe he deserves to be with hikari.

With the "I didn’t lie. I’ve loved Hikari, for so long, ever since way back." ngl that does piss me off more lol. Cus yuu can't act like he's always been in love with hikari since childhood when he was dating and having sex with ayami. that is just so disingenuous to both his relationship hikari and his past relationship with ayami. and yes ik, this is a manga about dumb horny teenagers making even dumber choices, but still. if yuu was clear and said something like he fell in love with hikari when they were kids, moved on when he met ayami, but after his breakup, fell back in love with hikari, i would less upset. it still feels like he treats hikari as a rebound tho.


i do hope he does improve as a person, but i just don't think he derserves to go out with hikari with how dishonest he is with her. I think as, if hikari never saw them kiss, yuu wouldn't have told her, and it will end up being a situation of tensions building between yuu and ayami, and hikari not knowing anything, and when she does eventually finds out, it will hurt her more.

Personally I actually think it was pretty shitty thing to do to Yami I said this to another reply but I think it's clear him him having feelings for Hikari prevented him from getting completely invested in his relationship with Yami- he thought he couldn't be with Hikari so he tried dating someone but but in the end just couldn't in truth put his all into it I think he loved her to an extent but in the end he never fell out of love with Hikari- he tried but he just couldn't in the end

As for weither he deserves Hikari or not? I actually don't think that's for any of us to truly say/decide in the end he's fucked and made mistakes NO ONE (well no one with brain cells) is denying that in fact he made a pretty big one but there's still two important factors

1. How things proceed from here mainly Yuu's actions and weither or not he learns from his mistakes

2. Weither Hikari herself is able to forgive him

If he actually realizes everything he's done and takes responsibility (apologizes, starts being more honest/open ect) and Hikari forgives his then I think that all that ACTUALLY matters

Now- this may sound kinda terrible- but I think Hikari seeing the kiss was probably a good thing if it forces Yuu to really realize how damaging his lack of openness and get his act together

 

[middle-the-nerd]

Yeah i just dont see it with the Yuu was crying because he wanted to get back together with Yami theory.

I said it before on here, but that whole rant/kiss was a big suggestion from Yami that she is still in love with Yuu. And if Yuu really wanted to get back together with Yami he would try to there and then, but he didnt and thats why im convinced he is not in love with her anymore.

Yuu crying because he finally has some closure to his first ever real relationship is surely a more realistic scenario? Like after being ghosted, i dont think he could talk about it with anyone else and that quite a hard thing to deal with if your an adult, let alone when you are still a teen.

Definitely

It obviously very emotional for him- hell it's be incredibly emotional for basically ANYONE especially considering he still does care about Yami even if he holds no more romantic feelings

And yeah getting ghosted is fucking ROUGH and a very hard thing to talk about especially when you just can't really fully understand why it happened tbh it's something I COMPLETELY understand why he never opened up about it to anyone

 

[middle-the-nerd]

I don't know about you guys but I will place my bet on real life people acting more dumb than these three if this kind of situation happens in real life.

Oh yeah honestly you're probably not wrong

Hell teenagers especially would probably handle all of this WAY WORSE lmao

Teens are completely emotionally immature and have so much to learn it's why I'm totally willing to give Yuu a chance to better himself and it's why I give him credit that in the novelization of chapter 38 he FULLY acknowledges to himself he was fucking shitty in how he handled it all that's probably more than ALOT of people his age or honestly in general could do

 

[middle-the-nerd]

Definitely agree and I think Aya also picked up on this & kinda tested him on this & [strike]it's one of the reasons she asks if he ever told Hikari about her.[/strike] B/c in this manga, Aya/Hikari/Yuu cannot stop talking about the people they care about.

Yeah they really can't lol

I also don't think Aya/Yuu is happening, but I can plausibly see the author getting there.

Childhood friend rought losing again

Absolutely evastating

To me that's sorta same difference? Like initiating/acts is how she shows care so she wanted him to reciprocate in the same (love) language.

Tbh I think that wasn't fully fair of her to expect people express love in different ways but also I get her thinking lol

 

[middle-the-nerd]

I feel like that take robs him of his agency. He had reasons for all his decisions sure, but like
he chose to date Aya instead of confessing to Hikari, he chose to not push Aya on her lies, he chose to go with the flow in their relationship, he chose to accept the ghosting, he chose to go to the festival knowing there might be an issue, he chose to confess to Hikari knowing she was upset. Did he have good reasons for each individual choice? Sure, but they did add up to two girls being hurt in part b/c of his actions & he's also accountable - which I think he understands giving the crying with Aya and thinking he's the worst with Hikari.

Honestly I think both excusing his actions because of "emotional distress" and saying judging him as a terrble person for aren't fair or really reasonable

I genuinely think Yuu was trying to handle things the best he could given HIS circumstances and certainly think he's been going through shit as well so we gotta be a bit understanding

He didn't handle things well and he DID still make his choices no matter how much I empathize with his situations he's still responsible for those choices

And as you said

I think he understands giving the crying with Aya and thinking he's the worst with Hikari

After the festival I think he's now realizing what he's been doing is a poor way to handle everything

He did what he thought was the best (or at least handled things the best he could) and he's only now realizing it really wasn't hopefully this leads to him actually being open like he should be

Edit: btw i'm not saying you're judging him just people in general

 

[middle-the-nerd]

And Yuu could have pushed harder, like Hikari did. Yuu chose to stop the line of questioning, which is why Aya thinks he just didn't care that much b/c Aya keeps pushing even when it makes Yuu twitchy. Like yeah, he was probably trying to give her space but she's not a mind reader so he should have communicated that. But again I don't actually expect children to have the maturity or communication skills to navigate "I want you to open up to me but am giving you the space to do it in your own time".

Yep the fact some people EXPECT them to is kinda weird to me lol especially when Yuu himself clearly struggles with being open

Broken record here of I'm not judging inexperienced kids for being bad at difficult conversations, mostly just think that the manga is doing a pretty good job of showing the fallout.

Yeah definitely agree it's doing quite a good job with showing the fallout

Although hopefully everyone (especially Yuu) actually learns from this and actually tries mending things

i'm not a big fan of the idea that they should just all "part ways" with each other personally

 

[middle-the-nerd]

Yeah in this scenario, Yuu emotion only taken over him after seeing that Hikari decided not to say anything to him and then just inviting him to go home instead lol
Doesnt really make sense tbh but better than the "i just have to" as a reasoning for me lol

But yeah as you said, i am also not really sure about this but i would just really really hate it if Yuu reasoning for the confession is "i just have to" tbh

Yeah it was almost certainly completely driven by emotions and was spur of the moment

Him getting closure over Yami probably played a big part in it though imo

 

[middle-the-nerd]

if you look at this manga objectively (people won’t) yuu has been a victim the entire story but instead of feeling sympathy for him, the comments hate on him for being “wishy-washy.” Mind you, his indecisiveness is due to the emotional distress he’s dealt with since the start of the manga

Tbh kinda feel like everyone at this point everyone has been a "victim" to SOME extent

Yuu clearly suffers from a major lack of self confidence and feelings of inadequacy and got completely ghosted by Yami

Yuu entered a relationship with Yami despite being in love with Hikari meaning essentially he couldn't get invested in the relationship

Yuu failed to be open with Hikari and lied to her

I completely feel sympathy for him but his actions are still his own amd at the end of the day, he is still responsible but that ALSO doesn't mean he's really a bad person- in fact I think he's actually a nice guy who's just fucked up and needs to learn to handle this shit which is understandable for someone his age going through his problems

All of that said...yeah while I agree his choices should be criticized I also agree the Yuu hate and complete lack of sympathy from some people isn't fair

 

[middle-the-nerd]

Ngl to me the idea that Hikari could never forgive Yuu over this feels a bit much to me

Like yeah she's obviously hurt and upset over it and understandably so but it's ALSO Hikari we're talking about if Yuu bucked the fuck up and opened up to her that'd do ALOT imo she seems very understanding

 

[GennArc]

Ngl to me the idea that Hikari could never forgive Yuu over this feels a bit much to me

Like yeah she's obviously hurt and upset over it and understandably so but it's ALSO Hikari we're talking about if Yuu bucked the fuck up and opened up to her that'd do ALOT imo she seems very understanding

Even if we don't discuss this as a romance manga, where she is obviously going to forgive him, I don't think he did something unforgivable from a RL perspective either. The complete trust they used to have might be broken, but if she is seriously in love with him, this should not be a show stopper.