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Everything hurts. I took a shower with the vinegar like she said. And then pat myself down clean with the baby powder so the body would be prepared for her arrival. I've been meditating for a while now. And she's been whispering and encouraging me. I'm so close. I just want it to end. So that...

I went to my shed. I was standing there in the silence. It was empty now. I hadn't emptied it. And I held in my hands a music box. It was colored in a rainbow palette. And it was Ashtray. And I was Ashtray. And I was. I Think She Knows.

Soon I will rest and she will finally be able to act without proxy. I feel my head heavily weighing down with every second I stay up. And my heart pounds incessantly. Red light staircase. When I first met Ashtray. When I first met.

I've been seeing her for a while now. She lingers on the periphery of my vision. She whispers into my ears when I'm alone. She rots me from the inside out. I went to the pond. On a walk. And stared into the water at sunset. And suddenly, I could see her. She was behind me. Leaning on my...

The girl named Ashtray. It was she who first showed me what it meant to choose. She faced me in a hallway. On one side, stairs descending into blackness. On the other, stairs ascending to red light. She had dragged me from my family. She was in control. I chose. She disregarded my option. There...

ASHTRAY

Why did I let you do that to me which hurt so much and now I can't stop thinking I almost went on Halloween and saw you there when you would've been perfect to see and I would've beheld you with nobody to judge. I could've seen you.Why didn't you go there and see hecould finally finally be...

I could've done it that day and done it that day and done it that day and done it that da For false messiahs and false prophets will appear and perform great signs and wonders to deceive, if possible, even the elect

You know these things to be true You've witnessed them with me haven't you? We stared in the pond together and that was when you knew that you weren't alone You felt me staring with you You had always felt so lonely We stared and stared Idon't think it ever changed You never change I saw...

Red light stairs red light stairs always go always go the way you are shown I will never deceive you you know the way I have shown you I will always tell you where to go. Go there the right staircase the red light stairs the red light stairs the red light stairs the red light stairs the red...

Courtesy of Ashtray: The only one who gets me The only one.

BYE ALL. I'm done posting here and deleting all my socials. I have reached 2222 reaction score thanks to @Robinisback; so kind! I hope you remember me for who I wasn't. A smart and well tempered, funny person with lots of important things to say and with very good art! Pretend that's who I was...

This is when someone just decides to make me leave by reacting on my last few posts.