Kono Inu to Kitara Mago no Koto shika Kangaeteinai ~Kensei Maou no Yarinokoshi~ - Vol. 1 Ch. 3 - What’s this about making up with the Demon King?

[MangaDex]

 

[Ironclad]

An MTL is no excuse for basic grammatical errors. If you don't have a good grasp on English OR Japanese, don't even try.

 

[InsidiousFiddler]

An MTL is no excuse for basic grammatical errors. If you don't have a good grasp on English OR Japanese, don't even try.

Or... you could actually be helpful and tell me the page that has mistakes on it? It's not hard for me to fix it, just takes time to actually find it when you're doing 32 pages of cleaning, redrawing, and attempting to clean up MTL that likes to be weird.

 

[hythae]

bro has no bulge

too early to tell how evil the demons really are since one of them can can fall in love and have a child with a human but id say it wouldnt seem too out of character for this demon to allow the knights to destroy the village just to create an excuse to move his grandchild away.

 

[GreenDude1]

An MTL is no excuse for basic grammatical errors. If you don't have a good grasp on English OR Japanese, don't even try.

Exactly!! So far this translation is pretty good but there are some translations that are so bad that I wonder if the people even speak English. How can someone look at a bunch of gibberish that means basically nothing and decide that that's a good translation?

 

[AMicrowave]

need novel spoilers

 

[Ironclad]

Or... you could actually be helpful and tell me the page that has mistakes on it? It's not hard for me to fix it, just takes time to actually find it when you're doing 32 pages of cleaning, redrawing, and attempting to clean up MTL that likes to be weird.

There were so many but sure, I'll start. The laziest mistakes were using ambiguous pronouns, noun verb tense mismatch, and phonetic transliteration. It doesn't take time at all. If basic proofreading is harder for you than cleaning and redrawing, then you probably don't have a good grasp on English. That or you're just really lazy in weird places.

Page 4 Panel 4 What was "sonic end" supposed to mean? That he avoided the shockwave from the attack? This appears to be a transliteration without any thought to whether it makes sense.

Page 6 Panel 2 Again transliteration. Omega isn't saying Em is the demon king, but that's what you wrote because you followed the Japanese syntax. "The girl...the demon king is protecting her." Was too liberal an interpretation for you?

Page 7 Panel 1 "...Right? I told you so..." Clearly wrong. "...See? I told you so..." is a lot more natural. It seems to be a verbal tic of Nyaa-ta so it's admittedly harder to find a good equivalent if he keeps doing it.
Panel 5 Omega is clearly a Lady Knight. Unless there's a running joke about Em assuming Omega is a man, you just missed that entirely.

Page 8 Panel 3 This doesn't make any sense. Taken literally Omega is wondering if a granddaughter is considered a family member. In Japanese it's more natural, she's quoting/summarizing both of their previous statements. "The demon king mentioned his 'beloved granddaughter'...this little girl called him family?"

Page 10 Panel 3 A missing glyph

Page 12 "Golden Cat Iron Blade" must be a transliteration. I would guess Nyaa-ta (Spelling?) is supposed to be a Maneki-neko, a beckoning cat. That doesn't have a lot of literary references to draw from so the iron blade part is a judgement call, but was it really iron? Swords are never made of iron, they're made of steel. It's a single character difference between 鉄 (Tetsu) and 鋼 (Kōtetsu). Maybe an archaic term for straight swords like 剣 (Tsurugi)?

Page 13 Wrong usage of definite article "the" which is a mistake so unnatural, it's a dead give away you're not a native English speaker.
Panel 2 Again ambiguous pronoun.

Page 14 So many problems. Definite article again. What is the name of the kingdom? Is it "Arugatama" like you spelled phonetically on Page 13 or "Algae"? The order of the title is also awkward in English. "The Golden Cat Dragon of the Five Divine Beasts of Creation" would be more natural. I'm questioning if 'dragon' is the correct translation. Does he look like a dragon to you? There's many ways to translate the many characters for dragon in Japanese. You sure "god" or "divine" or "noble" or "spirit" didn't work?

I assume this is all supposed to be past tense? Or panel 2 is past participle? Should be "met" and "joined" or "would meet" and "join." "Here" makes no sense as there was no reference to a location.

Page 15 More tense issues. "Will fall" is wrong. It should either be "fell" past tense or "would fall" past conditional. I'm leaning towards past conditional as it's due to the prior clause "exhausted from the prolonged harsh journey." There's no way you couldn't think of a better choice of words than "grooming."

Page 16 Panel 2 Another missing glyph. Overall very awkward transliteration of Omega's inner monologue. It's verbose and unnatural. "His raigan form should be vulnerable...he's in striking range...I won't get a better chance."

Page 19 You're getting the speaker confused between Omega and the Demon King. Missing glyph and more wrong pronouns.

Page 20 Phonetic transliteration. It's more work to do this then actually translate it.

Page 21 Inconsistent spelling. Is it "Nyaa-ta" or "Nyata"? Stick with one.

Page 22 Again, is it "Em" or "Emu"?
Panel 3 Completely incoherent. Is Omega saying she wants to travel? No she's already travelling. Is she summarizing what Em said and you got the subject tense wrong again? Was she trying to ask for something completely separate and was cut off by Em getting flustered?

Page 23 Is it "Dragonrein" (Page 13) or "Dragonrain"?

Page 30 "Alama" instead of "Alma" and now it's the "Arga" Kingdom.

I get the impression you improved in the last couple pages, but you never revised the earlier translations. Don't put on airs. This was incredibly lazy.

 

[InsidiousFiddler]

There were so many but sure, I'll start. The laziest mistakes were using ambiguous pronouns, noun verb tense mismatch, and phonetic transliteration. It doesn't take time at all. If basic proofreading is harder for you than cleaning and redrawing, then you probably don't have a good grasp on English. That or you're just really lazy in weird places.

Page 4 Panel 4 What was "sonic end" supposed to mean? That he avoided the shockwave from the attack? This appears to be a transliteration without any thought to whether it makes sense.

Page 6 Panel 2 Again transliteration. Omega isn't saying Em is the demon king, but that's what you wrote because you followed the Japanese syntax. "The girl...the demon king is protecting her." Was too liberal an interpretation for you?

Page 7 Panel 1 "...Right? I told you so..." Clearly wrong. "...See? I told you so..." is a lot more natural. It seems to be a verbal tic of Nyaa-ta so it's admittedly harder to find a good equivalent if he keeps doing it.
Panel 5 Omega is clearly a Lady Knight. Unless there's a running joke about Em assuming Omega is a man, you just missed that entirely.

Page 8 Panel 3 This doesn't make any sense. Taken literally Omega is wondering if a granddaughter is considered a family member. In Japanese it's more natural, she's quoting/summarizing both of their previous statements. "The demon king mentioned his 'beloved granddaughter'...this little girl called him family?"

Page 10 Panel 3 A missing glyph

Page 12 "Golden Cat Iron Blade" must be a transliteration. I would guess Nyaa-ta (Spelling?) is supposed to be a Maneki-neko, a beckoning cat. That doesn't have a lot of literary references to draw from so the iron blade part is a judgement call, but was it really iron? Swords are never made of iron, they're made of steel. It's a single character difference between 鉄 (Tetsu) and 鋼 (Kōtetsu). Maybe an archaic term for straight swords like 剣 (Tsurugi)?

Page 13 Wrong usage of definite article "the" which is a mistake so unnatural, it's a dead give away you're not a native English speaker.
Panel 2 Again ambiguous pronoun.

Page 14 So many problems. Definite article again. What is the name of the kingdom? Is it "Arugatama" like you spelled phonetically on Page 13 or "Algae"? The order of the title is also awkward in English. "The Golden Cat Dragon of the Five Divine Beasts of Creation" would be more natural. I'm questioning if 'dragon' is the correct translation. Does he look like a dragon to you? There's many ways to translate the many characters for dragon in Japanese. You sure "god" or "divine" or "noble" or "spirit" didn't work?

I assume this is all supposed to be past tense? Or panel 2 is past participle? Should be "met" and "joined" or "would meet" and "join." "Here" makes no sense as there was no reference to a location.

Page 15 More tense issues. "Will fall" is wrong. It should either be "fell" past tense or "would fall" past conditional. I'm leaning towards past conditional as it's due to the prior clause "exhausted from the prolonged harsh journey." There's no way you couldn't think of a better choice of words than "grooming."

Page 16 Panel 2 Another missing glyph. Overall very awkward transliteration of Omega's inner monologue. It's verbose and unnatural. "His raigan form should be vulnerable...he's in striking range...I won't get a better chance."

Page 19 You're getting the speaker confused between Omega and the Demon King. Missing glyph and more wrong pronouns.

Page 20 Phonetic transliteration. It's more work to do this then actually translate it.

Page 21 Inconsistent spelling. Is it "Nyaa-ta" or "Nyata"? Stick with one.

Page 22 Again, is it "Em" or "Emu"?
Panel 3 Completely incoherent. Is Omega saying she wants to travel? No she's already travelling. Is she summarizing what Em said and you got the subject tense wrong again? Was she trying to ask for something completely separate and was cut off by Em getting flustered?

Page 23 Is it "Dragonrein" (Page 13) or "Dragonrain"?

Page 30 "Alama" instead of "Alma" and now it's the "Arga" Kingdom.

I get the impression you improved in the last couple pages, but you never revised the earlier translations. Don't put on airs. This was incredibly lazy.

went through and applied fixes across the chapter:

Reworked P02 (Sonic End), P04 (speaker/subject clarity), P06 (granddaughter/family dialogue), and P18 for general readability. Several panels had the Japanese syntax carried over too directly, restructured those into more natural English.

Omega is consistently she/her now, fixed throughout P11-P12 where it was wrong. Standardized naming to Nyata, Dragorein, Arga, and Alma across the whole chapter - previously these were inconsistent between pages.

"Golden Cat Iron Blade" is now "Golden Cat-Dragon Armor." Looking at the raw Japanese (創世五神獣 黄金猫龍), everything seems to agree it's Golden Cat-Dragon, one of the Five Genesis Divine Beasts. Related ability names updated to match.

P11-P13 backstory narration cleaned up for consistent past tense and more natural sentence order. P14 and surrounding pages got structural passes too. Fixed missing glyphs, corrected "see?" for Nyata's verbal tic, caught a few missed speech bubbles.

I believe it still has some smaller issues, but this should fix all the major ones that you brought up. I'll work on improving the quality/review of the translations, also probably going to fix some of the names of the Arga Knights.

 

[NeverAnother]

went through and applied fixes across the chapter:

Reworked P02 (Sonic End), P04 (speaker/subject clarity), P06 (granddaughter/family dialogue), and P18 for general readability. Several panels had the Japanese syntax carried over too directly, restructured those into more natural English.

Omega is consistently she/her now, fixed throughout P11-P12 where it was wrong. Standardized naming to Nyata, Dragorein, Arga, and Alma across the whole chapter - previously these were inconsistent between pages.

"Golden Cat Iron Blade" is now "Golden Cat-Dragon Armor." Looking at the raw Japanese (創世五神獣 黄金猫龍), everything seems to agree it's Golden Cat-Dragon, one of the Five Genesis Divine Beasts. Related ability names updated to match.

P11-P13 backstory narration cleaned up for consistent past tense and more natural sentence order. P14 and surrounding pages got structural passes too. Fixed missing glyphs, corrected "see?" for Nyata's verbal tic, caught a few missed speech bubbles.

I believe it still has some smaller issues, but this should fix all the major ones that you brought up. I'll work on improving the quality/review of the translations, also probably going to fix some of the names of the Arga Knights.

Thank you so much for putting in the effort and being able to make the changes while not letting an initially unhelpful person’s derision dissuade you from continuing. I really appreciate the chapter and this story.