Yes, that's absolutely something a friend would say. Friends don't spare feelings if they notice a flaw. While I wouldn't consider that a flaw, other people might.
If the intention of how to read it is "that thing," I think it's okay to write it as that. Might reduce the subtext, but that's made irrelevant with the TN note anyway.
Dad needed that kick in the ass. Can't run away from her like that. Or rather, his own emotions.
So, if their culture don't see anything other than a memory in graves, why do they keep them maintained like that? And there are flowers on the grave next to them, so the logic kind of breaks there.