I'm pretty sure at this point it's a habit that suppresses her emotions, bulimia is pretty good at that (or eating disorders in general). So I wouldn't take what she's doing to herself to heart, unless she's made explicit comments regarding what shape of body she does or doesn't wantIts really harrowing to be a large bodied person and read this. I live a normal life and here this girl's life is wrecked cos shes so utterly disgusted and terrified of the thought of even looking a tiny bit like me. Its...a lot.
I think it's supposed to be about knowing when to stop throwing up once you've reached the "bottom" of the contents of your stomach? Maybe there's an actual English term for it, but I wouldn't really know how to research it eitherI'm curious about the "bottom" phenomenon she talks about. I couldn't find anything about it online. Is it like how competitive eaters will eat salads to stay full? Does it make it easier to vomit if all the junk food is at top?