Let me know if you spot any typos!
hope you enjoy it!
Thanks!~ I look forward to more!~ It looks interesting! The art is well done, and the premise is novel enough despite the underlying trope being extant. However, it's doing a fine job maintaining the underlying agency of the character. Also, it actually shows a weakened, sickly body, which is a first. I haven't seen characters typically drawn/represented this viscerally bad (in terms of poor health). That alone makes it novel compared to a lot of its peers.
Likewise, it doesn't have her immediately escape or rescued. It doesn't elevate the father to some "outwardly out of touch" figure who is used by his wife, but a legit impression of a sexist trope whereby until we see otherwise, the man, who seems to be totally focused upon himself, couldn't give a flying fuck about his eldest daughter, who is literally sickly and dying because of neglect.
It shows a potentially more historically accurate [in terms of what we have based upon extant cultural literature and law] representation of how difficult stuff was for women. Even with "cheats", her agency isn't a given. She has to "figure shit out", and because she's sickly, she's in a real plight because she can't just, "hop out the window and flip them the bird".
The narration from characters complaining does a pretty good job of "showing" vs "telling", as it operates as a dual purpose by not only showing that her situation is clearly preventable, but that her "mother" [step-mother] is out burning through money.
My only major complaint at this point is we need to see more nuance with the characters, specifically the other sister and mother. Repeating Cinder Ella, while being fine in principle, does necessitate a
smidge of
operational complexity in character dynamics. Like, I'll want to see motivations and the cause of this behavior.
I get that there's the whole "If I kill off the eldest, then my daughter may inherit", however, that's only if women even can inherit. We'll need to see clear results of that. Otherwise, she's 'wasting' [vindictively] a 'resource' of the household as women were so often viewed in higher society, for daughters were "sold off" effectively in "marriages" as a form of relational contracts. The families would get something out of it as a consequence. Murdering off a "valuable resource" instead of "marrying her out" will need to be narratively justified on some level. I'm hoping the author goes about explaining
WHY this noble woman is successfully isolating her step-daughter when she could otherwise
use her as a means of family advancement by "selling her off as a bride". There will need to be some more narrative hole filling. But overall, I'm enjoying the premise. How well it eventually pans out will eventually reveal itself as we keep going.
Thanks for the translation, cleaning, typesetting, etc.!~ Even machine translation is something!~ Plus, it gets better by the era.
That said, it would be great if someone with some skill volunteered to help!~ :3