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He's right behind me, isn't he?

shoots you

We won't retire, we'll die.

Single pan fusilli, ground beef, oregano, olive oil, lotsa salt, black pepper, chilly flakes, simmered until your patience runs out, bit of italian tomato paste, whisked into meat juice so it disperses properly, throw the pasta into whatever juice was left, add some hot water, mix until cooked...

Plague survivors be like.

I'm calling out NSA for getting both a faceshot and a dickshot of perverts, but not sharing that data with us.

Check my phone for what? Porn? Who the fuck watches porn on their phone.

I'm a total animal in the bed, no way anyone is defeating me unarmed.

Guess the user from one emoji. Tip, its totally not @Chen.png

Total twink death.

Strikecock.

That's why you'd invite me to vibe check wannabe gangsters.

Mark 5:9? Sure. Its also a SMT reference.

With a mindset like that, you'll never reach your daily protein requirement.

Robin, that's extremely xeno- Lmao, just kidding. If we ever get a cockroach pandemic, the culprit will be the chinese.

He probably meant the japanese cockroaches from mars, not the puny ones here on earth.

You always post moving pictures. Is it because you're a zoomer?

Defaultbros think they're a legion, because they're many.