...And that is how the two yakuza houses went to war that day.
[cut to two lines of yakuza thugs holding bats, knives, butane torches and wooden mallets]
"LET'S GO TO WAR!"
"The fifth annual Way of the House Husband Yakuza Bake Off has started!"
"Boss, this baseball bat is a surprisingly good rolling pin..."
"I know, right? Found that out when my last rolling pin split apart when I dropped it."