A Witch's Hopeless Wish - Ch. 65

[plantlots]

this chapter was a wild ride 😩🤞 ty for the translations!!

 

[sinarblood]

@Stoner
I think you are looking at this from the point of view of an onlooker, rather than from Caidel's.

Yeah his dad was a dick to him, but Caidel probably still loved him. There are almost certainly other villagers he liked, dear friends among the children, people he looked up to among the adults.

Then they all died because of Ellen, and he lived for years not knowing that it was unintentional.

His whole world upended because of her. Everything he knew and loved ruined.

Years of hate. Years of nightmares. Of dreams and thoughts of people that he never would see again.

Then he falls in love with the person who did that, not knowing their identity. He finds out the truth.

He realizes it wasn't intentional. He realizes that she had no way of predicting the result, and that they were trying to kill her.

He even reassures her that it isn't her fault.

He even lies to the person who he sees as his mother figure to cover for her.

But that sure as anything doesn't mean that his emotions aren't in turmoil.

That doesn't mean that every single villager, to the last man, woman, and child deserved that death. That doesn't mean that those years of hate, of nightmares, of thoughts of revenge being his sole driving force go away instantly. It doesn't erase the sheer guilt he must feel for lying to his mother about Ellen.

The person that he loves the most is also the person that he used to hate the most venomously.

Humans aren't so logical creatures that they can easily get over having everyone they knew and loved killed by someone else when presented with evidence that it was accidental.

Evidence mind you, that is only the word of said killer that he used to hate.

Now, I am sure that Caidel knows she told the truth. I am also pretty certain that he loves her.

But those other emotions haven't entirely vanished, and is an issue that he has to work through.

But calling him a retard for having any resentment towards someone who inadvertently killed everyone else he loved, causing PTSD levels of trauma, with finding her and getting his revenge being his driving motivation ever since that event is ridiculous.

He absolutely knows that it wasn't really her fault, and even told her so, but trauma of the level he experienced is something in the real world would be extremely difficult to overcome over years with a good therapist.

Said theoretical therapist would probably also most certainly heavily advise against dating the living embodiment of his trauma.

Every moment he spends with her must remind him of everyone he lost. Might even bring him back to memories of the fire. No wonder he has such a serious face every time he doesn't think anyone is watching when looking at Eleanor.

Even still I think just about every conscious decision he made and word he said about Eleanor has been for Eleanor's benefit. Hiding her identity from his mother, comforting her, telling her that the deaths she caused in the village wasn't her fault, going on this date with her. His panicked rush to save her when she went into a dangerous monster filled area.

Things like holding her neck to tightly or hesitating for a split second when she tripped I don't think were conscious decisions on his part, but were an unconscious result of his emotional turmoil.

Frankly if Caidel so easily overcame his trauma due to his love for Eleanor that would be much more SoD breaking than this.

 

[tmyu]

Thank you so much!!!

 

[athyloveclub]

ngl the entire sequence of caidel annihilating that creature was beautifully drawn
i really hope these two clear up everything and talk about their feelings (๑′̥̥̥▵‵̥̥̥ ૂ๑)

 

[quanle]

Gymnastics? You mean roller coaster

 

[silkyprada]

i'd rather they just reveal their truths to each and make up it hurts seeing them struggle idk why caidel froze when he reached out his hand but i hope they clear all the misunderstandings. i still think that he genuinely does love ellen but his inner conflict is just eating him up from within😔

 

[spyridoula]

well that escalated fast😳
thank you for your the update!

 

[tissuebox]

the whole rose explanation at the end was DEEP it felt like i was in an english class doing an analysis💀 but seriously, it hurt seeing ellen feel insecure because of caidel's mixed signals and becoming conscious of what noah said to her😔 i literally can't predict how this manhwa is gonna turn out anymore lol

 

[flirts]

it's the split personality for me

 

[yeoryeong]

honestly i love how much depth caidel's character has. say what you want but it's really not often we see an ml that has this much to their character and his whole internal conflict is what's running the manhwa😌

thank you for the chapter ♥

 

[Eplayer]

thanks for the chapter

 

[corinna]

thank you for the fast release!! caidel kinda popped off with that golden light/aura of his wtf that was so pretty i want to see more of that,,also can we just talk about how cute it is that a hamster popped into his mind when he was watching ellen nibble on her desert ੭व(๑• .̫ •๑) ✧

 

[Moonie-light]

It breaks my heart reading every chapter but at the same time I keep reading and waiting for update impatiently, it is like an addiction😅 Anyways thanks a lot for the updates~^^

 

[Leonhart93]

@dragora86 Thanks, it's good to know I am not the only one, it always feels like people expect only a single thing from these types of stories ^_^

@sinarblood

Yeah his dad was a dick to him, but Caidel probably still loved him. There are almost certainly other villagers he liked, dear friends among the children, people he looked up to among the adults.
Then they all died because of Ellen, and he lived for years not knowing that it was unintentional.

Yup, thought the same but there is only so much you can write in a single comment. There might be a point of view we didn't see before.
What if someone important to Caidel died in that village, like say a childhood friend? The inner tumult of sorting through that would be painful.

 

[Red225]

"I... I just wanted to see your dress becoming wet and seethrough! It was wrong, I know!"

 

[vaneatas]

wow that cry scene when he saw ellen.... i really do hope he gets to have a good talk with her and actually say whats on his mind even if it hurts her because then at least she won't be confused by his actions
also sinarblood described caidel's situation so well if that turns out to be the truth. i also believe the same thing that he might be in love with ellen but his memories about the past are making his subconsciously do things that hurt her

 

[stressedcoffee]

I hope they can finally properly communicate about it (

 

[bonjavenue]

ahhhh those tears at the end got me ಥ_ಥ
i really hope ellen and caidel can work this our somehow
i love how much thought the author has put into caidel's character and i love how human emotion is portrayed in this manhwa.
just like the comments below, it's really easy to just throw shit at caidel for being 'two-faced' or 'fake' but what he's going through is literal ptsd.
ptsd nightmares aren't always exact replays of the event. sometimes they replay the emotions you felt during the event such as fear, helplessness, and sadness.
and i think it's gonna take a lot of time for caidel to heal. after all, there's no timestamp on trauma and there isn't a formula that you can insert yourself into to get from horror to healed.
anyways, i feel like i've been rambling and i know this is just a manhwa and it's not that deep but i just think that people were so quick to judge caidel and the way he's been acting without looking deeper into his character and his past.

 

[Aloya]

Yes person who hates me with all his heart but has either none at all or very sketchy reasons to hate me, why are you crying?

 

[yourthrone]

bruh some people really need to take it easy on caidel💀 mans is literally traumatised and has ptsd...yes he's been acting 'sus' but that's because of his trauma babe😬 i love ellen but idk why some people have this weird attitude where they make her out to be some angel in this whole thing,, like at the end of the day whether or not it was intentional, she took out an entire village and killed hundreds of people and although she did that to defend herself, her actions still ended up killing innocent people.

a bunch of other people in the comments explain it better than me but seriously pls let's give him some room to breathe, heal and grow