Thanks for finishing it but well...I said this before, but if you adapt an H-work, then you gotta upgrade the narrative, I think you got to ask yourself as a reader, why would I read this instead of the Original?
The answer to me should be creating something with the same level of eroticism, while having a better pace, devoid of the tropes of Hentai where sex has to happen very quickly due to a limited number of pages, explore the characters more and such.
You might think, why? Why go to this lenght for an ecchi romcom (possibly harem) ?
Well to which I reply, because otherwise why wouldn't one read the original instead?
At least the protagonist doesn't sexually assault her in this one.