Man I get his desperation. I was the third (final) speaker in competitive debate back in high school but last minute in the competition my teacher forced me to swap out to being the first speaker. I actually cried and had a nervous breakdown because of it. In the end even though I passed from the international regional rounds to the final international global one, I chose not to participate because I was just that traumatised. To this day i havent participated in a debate since then.