Black Lily to Shirayuri-chan - Vol. 4 Ch. 19
- Thread starter MangaDex
- Start date
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Jun 8, 2018
- Messages
- 1,515
ok.. time to join the massacre.. where's the armory at? im gonna participate.. 😤
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Jun 8, 2018
- Messages
- 1,515
lol.. didn't displayed my first comment.. now double posted.. kek.. wth..
(they should really add delete option..)
(they should really add delete option..)
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2019
- Messages
- 3,177
When you think it can't get worse. Did the author have a problem with mens ? All mens in the manga are just assholes. Why can't mangakas understand that mens in Yuri are not necessarely a bad thing (Maki in Bloom into you is the vest example). The manga is also tie with Citrus for the most among of unnecessary dramas and god know comparing it to Citrus is not a compliment.
Group Leader
- Joined
- Mar 1, 2019
- Messages
- 3,050
Sighs here we go again...
Double-page supporter
- Joined
- Nov 4, 2018
- Messages
- 174
Her mother and sisters are amazing people, her dad seems to be less accepting but has been pressured by the elderly people, and said elderly people are clearly the un-accepting older generation.
In terms of the translation, some small fixes (which I shall again put in a spoiler), but I feel the most occurring issue is sometimes missing the word "got" in sentences, which I'll note each time;
I could dive deeper into the translation, but those are the ones I think are more noticeable. Hope it helps is some ways, if at all.
In terms of the translation, some small fixes (which I shall again put in a spoiler), but I feel the most occurring issue is sometimes missing the word "got" in sentences, which I'll note each time;
Page 1: "Yuri, does the tie look ok?" - this is fine tbh, just a nitpick on my part that it could instead be; "Yuri, does my tie look ok?" or "Yuri, does my tie look alright?"
Page 11: "Of course, since you willingly give up your body to Lily, right?" - below is the same in that this is another where my brain autocorrected it and I had to reread it, which was as this; "Of course, since you willingly gave your body to Lily, right?", which I believe is the correct way to have worded the translation.
Page 11: "I raise you up to be honest and bold" - would better worded as; "I raised you to be honest and bold"
Page 13: "Yuma, Yumi, I'm back. I've souvenirs~" - I haven't seen the raw for this page, but this is the first instance of the previously mentioned issue about the word "got" being missing from the sentence for it to be grammatically correct; "Yuma, Yumi, I'm back. I've got souvenirs~"
Page 13: "T-thank you... I heard you've 2 younger sisters... they look cute. Just like you, Yuri" - an instance where, whilst technically correct, would be better as; "T-thank you... I heard you have 2 younger sisters... they look cute. Just like you, Yuri.". The reason I'm saying this is correct while providing a suggestion for a correction, is because (at least from my experience) you would use "you've" in a sentence to suggest a person has done something, eg "I know that you've done the work.", and use "you have" in a sentence to suggest a person has something, eg "I see that you have brown shoes." In the first instance, either "you have" or "you've" work fine as "you've" is just shortening the word count / effort when speaking, whereas in the second instance using "you've" works but sounds wrong to some English speakers. However, in the first instance, and the original translation, using the word "you've" is fine when it is followed by the word "got", as follows; "T-thank you... I heard you've got 2 younger sisters... they look cute. Just like you, Yuri". In the end, it comes down to the translator and PR's choice and we can only make recommendations.
Page 22: "I've someone I'm going out with..." - another sentence where the word "got" seems to be missing, and is a simple fix; "I've got someone I'm going out with..."
Page 22: "This is crazy, bringing in someone from the outside of this island? What's more, it's a male?!" - A few words in this bubble are unnecessary, so it can be shortened to this; "This is crazy, bringing someone from outside the island? What's more, it's a male?!" or "This is crazy, bringing someone from outside the island? What's more ,they're male?!". Both suggestions have the same message as the original, whilst shortening the word count (if you wish to conserve space).
Page 25: "Has your daughter become crazy after going to the land?!" - honestly, this one is just another nitpick on my end. There's no real need to change it since it gets the message across, but personally I feel it'd be better as; "Has your daughter gone crazy after leaving the island?!" or "Has your daughter gone crazy after going to the mainland?!", since both choices to me seem more grammatically appropriate.
Page 30: "She must be the foreigner, right?" - this is another nitpick mainly because it confused me for a little bit. He calls Yuri "the foreigner", but I assume the translation is meant to mean "a singular" and not "a specific" foreigner (what I mean by this is, for example, saying "Yuri is a foreigner" against saying "Yuri is the foreigner", the first meaning she's a singular and the second meaning she's a specific). If it's meant to point out he fact that she is a foreigner and not a specific foreigner, then it should be; "She must be a foreigner, right?" to be a more accurate translation.
Page 11: "Of course, since you willingly give up your body to Lily, right?" - below is the same in that this is another where my brain autocorrected it and I had to reread it, which was as this; "Of course, since you willingly gave your body to Lily, right?", which I believe is the correct way to have worded the translation.
Page 11: "I raise you up to be honest and bold" - would better worded as; "I raised you to be honest and bold"
Page 13: "Yuma, Yumi, I'm back. I've souvenirs~" - I haven't seen the raw for this page, but this is the first instance of the previously mentioned issue about the word "got" being missing from the sentence for it to be grammatically correct; "Yuma, Yumi, I'm back. I've got souvenirs~"
Page 13: "T-thank you... I heard you've 2 younger sisters... they look cute. Just like you, Yuri" - an instance where, whilst technically correct, would be better as; "T-thank you... I heard you have 2 younger sisters... they look cute. Just like you, Yuri.". The reason I'm saying this is correct while providing a suggestion for a correction, is because (at least from my experience) you would use "you've" in a sentence to suggest a person has done something, eg "I know that you've done the work.", and use "you have" in a sentence to suggest a person has something, eg "I see that you have brown shoes." In the first instance, either "you have" or "you've" work fine as "you've" is just shortening the word count / effort when speaking, whereas in the second instance using "you've" works but sounds wrong to some English speakers. However, in the first instance, and the original translation, using the word "you've" is fine when it is followed by the word "got", as follows; "T-thank you... I heard you've got 2 younger sisters... they look cute. Just like you, Yuri". In the end, it comes down to the translator and PR's choice and we can only make recommendations.
Page 22: "I've someone I'm going out with..." - another sentence where the word "got" seems to be missing, and is a simple fix; "I've got someone I'm going out with..."
Page 22: "This is crazy, bringing in someone from the outside of this island? What's more, it's a male?!" - A few words in this bubble are unnecessary, so it can be shortened to this; "This is crazy, bringing someone from outside the island? What's more, it's a male?!" or "This is crazy, bringing someone from outside the island? What's more ,they're male?!". Both suggestions have the same message as the original, whilst shortening the word count (if you wish to conserve space).
Page 25: "Has your daughter become crazy after going to the land?!" - honestly, this one is just another nitpick on my end. There's no real need to change it since it gets the message across, but personally I feel it'd be better as; "Has your daughter gone crazy after leaving the island?!" or "Has your daughter gone crazy after going to the mainland?!", since both choices to me seem more grammatically appropriate.
Page 30: "She must be the foreigner, right?" - this is another nitpick mainly because it confused me for a little bit. He calls Yuri "the foreigner", but I assume the translation is meant to mean "a singular" and not "a specific" foreigner (what I mean by this is, for example, saying "Yuri is a foreigner" against saying "Yuri is the foreigner", the first meaning she's a singular and the second meaning she's a specific). If it's meant to point out he fact that she is a foreigner and not a specific foreigner, then it should be; "She must be a foreigner, right?" to be a more accurate translation.
I could dive deeper into the translation, but those are the ones I think are more noticeable. Hope it helps is some ways, if at all.
Supporter
- Joined
- May 12, 2018
- Messages
- 2,970
@squigglesjp how much ordnance do you think we need? I’ve got plenty.
@kuzunagi13 I’ve got lots of weapons and armor, take your pick
@kuzunagi13 I’ve got lots of weapons and armor, take your pick
Power Uploader
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2018
- Messages
- 1,632
@sshazm thank you so much for pointing them out! I might not have understood all of it but the ones I did, it was very helpful xD
@Epicredeemer ordinance... what does ordinance mean? i did google it but it says law?
Do you perhaps have Cloud's Buster sword too? I'd love to omnislash them geezers
@kuzunagi13 you're always welcome, now won't you call : https://youtu.be/adjQUs1-9bI?t=189 to join us too? xD I'm sure those geezers would be honoured to perish from Katanas :>
Edit: by the way who's that mizuki kuzunagi in your profile picture ?
@Epicredeemer ordinance... what does ordinance mean? i did google it but it says law?
Do you perhaps have Cloud's Buster sword too? I'd love to omnislash them geezers
@kuzunagi13 you're always welcome, now won't you call : https://youtu.be/adjQUs1-9bI?t=189 to join us too? xD I'm sure those geezers would be honoured to perish from Katanas :>
Edit: by the way who's that mizuki kuzunagi in your profile picture ?
Active member
- Joined
- Jan 19, 2018
- Messages
- 234
Oh great, we just passed the crazy bitch from the blonde’s family, and after the drama when she almost lost her sanity due to the industrialists who were after her parents’fortune...and now this bunch of old geezers that thinks again that someone should decide for others...
Almost happy that this is going to end because it’s clear that author didn’t had a fuc*ing clue about how to continue.
Almost happy that this is going to end because it’s clear that author didn’t had a fuc*ing clue about how to continue.
Supporter
- Joined
- May 12, 2018
- Messages
- 2,970
@SquigglesJP sorry, meant ordnance. No "i".
ordnance noun
ord·nance | \ ˈȯrd-nən(t)s \
Definition of ordnance
1a : military supplies including weapons, ammunition, combat vehicles, and maintenance tools and equipment
b : a service of the army charged with the procuring, distributing, and safekeeping of ordnance
2 : CANNON, ARTILLERY
ordnance noun
ord·nance | \ ˈȯrd-nən(t)s \
Definition of ordnance
1a : military supplies including weapons, ammunition, combat vehicles, and maintenance tools and equipment
b : a service of the army charged with the procuring, distributing, and safekeeping of ordnance
2 : CANNON, ARTILLERY
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Jun 18, 2018
- Messages
- 367
So that's where she got her violent enraged mode from.
Power Uploader
- Joined
- Jan 31, 2018
- Messages
- 1,632
Ohhh! @Epicredeemer It's always good to see your weaponry is always full of toys ready to go ! I shall swipe what I can and let hell loose!
Group Leader
- Joined
- Feb 1, 2018
- Messages
- 2,532
Yuri's mother is awesome, could be my favourite character
Supporter
- Joined
- Apr 1, 2019
- Messages
- 849
whats with this writer and subarus?
Similar threads
