Chiisakobee - Vol. 3 Ch. 31

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Thanks for the chapter! It's interesting how these two are trying to be parents for the children. By the way, pages 8 and 7 are duplicates.
 

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Interesting to see the kids try to stand up for one another, despite the fact they're not real siblings and well, a bunch of weirdos.

And hell yeah corporal punishment
 
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Nowadays of course corporal punishment is considered totally, strictly out of bounds. Which basically leaves lecturing, "time outs" of one sort or another (which used to be called "go to your room!"), positive reinforcement of good behaviour (as in bribes and praise), and if you're lucky a certain amount of talking to the kid like they're capable of thinking and coming to an agreement about what makes sense. That last one IMO is the best, because if you can get the kid to see the sense behind how you want them to act, they'll do it because they believe in it instead of because they're coerced. Unfortunately, kids . . . and adults for that matter . . . aren't always into thinking rationally, so you can't always do that. When they're small you can also simply stop them from doing stuff you don't want by nonviolent physical coercion, ie picking them up and moving them.
OK, so mostly all that stuff is enough. And the scientists say that positive reinforcement works better than negative reinforcement. And hitting people is not a good way to act, and kids who get hit a lot, it doesn't have a good effect. So I agree that corporal punishment as a . . . habitual, ongoing practice, is basically a very bad idea. But there's gonna be those one or two times, just once or twice in the kid's life, when they fuck up really bad of their own free will and they are totally tuning you out and doing the tantrum and whatever, when nothing is getting through . . . at times like that I think a few swats on the butt can snap them the hell out of it. And the awareness that you have not completely given away that option helps reinforce in their minds that there are limits and you can and will enforce them. Kids don't need a ton of arbitrary rules, but they do need limits.
 
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Hahaha I couldn't stop laughing throughout this chapter. It's really nice seeing Shigeji and Ritsu trying their best to raise these kids.
 
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@Purplelibraryguy instilling fear into kid by physical punishment is definitely not the way to go mmm...
I might only have small sample, but kids... or rather parents that do that tends to affect negatively for the kids, the most common one is that they're less confident when doing most things mmm...
 
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@VawX It's not about instilling fear. And I know this is not something people are supposed to say these days. But kids tend to keep pushing; if they don't run up against any boundaries, the results are a pain in the ass for everyone, and it doesn't even make them happy. I've seen families where the kids know they can basically just get the parents to let them do whatever or have whatever by raising hell until they give in or at least bargain. Some of them, it's not that they're bad parents, they're just busy and they're too tired to hold out, so they take the quick fix and bargain, just calm down and you can have a treat. Of course it just means it will happen more. But I've never seen one of those kids seem very happy with their life. For small children, parents are the rock they rely on. How can a kid feel secure when their parents are weaker than they are? How can they depend on a pushover?
It's good if they know that there are points past which they cannot go. Corporal punishment is a terrible idea as a go-to approach for everyday. It's also a bad idea to ever do it because you're mad. But in the dynamic of implicit "Do what I say." "Yeah? Or else what?" it can be good for them to realize there is an "or else what?" even, or especially, if it's pretty much never used. It settles the question of who's where in the group dynamic, and they can relax.
Well, I say all that, but I only ever did it once. Daughter was having a massive tantrum that was not ending; all the calmness, firmness, time outs, whatever, was getting nowhere--she was out of control, both ours and her own; I don't think she could stop. Three swats on the butt and she totally snapped out of it and was fine--it was amazing, it just totally jumped her off the track she was going down, let her do a reset or something. Never got to that point any other time, but that one time it worked amazingly well. And I do think it probably had a positive residual impact too.
It's not like I believe kids should spend all their time doing what their parents order them. I was never interested in programming my kid's life; even when we went for walks, I'd let her investigate what she wanted and just amble along after her, making sure she didn't step in the street or something. She'd give me interesting rocks and pinecones and things; my pockets would end up full. But you do have to make sure they don't metaphorically step in the street. For that, it's sometimes needful they do what you bloody tell them.
 
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@Purplelibraryguy I'm still not good with long sentences but in conclusion I agree with most if not all what you said mmm...
I don't have a child myself but I've observed the interactions between parents and kids sometimes, one of the most impressive stuff I've seen is my cousin and his daughter mmm...
He's like super patient and calm when handling his kid, resulting in a very confidence kid, but at the same time he also set a limit to his kid that make his her also pretty discipline mmm...
Idk how exactly he did it, but when I saw their interactions, it's just very amazing sight mmm...
 
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Honestly, I think it's disgusting to hit kids. (But what else can I expect from an adaptation of a novel from the fifties.)

Leaving that aside, it was so cute that all children tried to protect the boy in their own way. 😍
 

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