Now ... I know my impotent friend over here knows how to throw hands (goodness knows he's not 'throwing' anything else). It would still be funny if he somehow takes the slam and still kicks their asses ... I would retire from school if I were them and that happened.
At THIS point you've already decided to help her (even if you were blackmailed into it) so man up. But if you're gonna walk away then walk away backwards jabroni.