Damn I remember being in Suyeon's shoes... it fuckin sucks. I heard my first lesbian crush saying the exact same thing and it made me feel like I was disgusting so I repressed my sexuality until high school when I got my first girlfriend. Because we went to a private Christian school we were almost expelled for being lesbians and her mom wanted to file a restraining order. Long story short, 6 years later we are living together and as happy as can be and we have people who love and support us. It makes all the difference.