Haikei, Arishi Hi ni Saku Hanatachi e - Ch. 19.1
- Thread starter MangaDex
- Start date
Group Leader
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2023
- Messages
- 249
Did it start with Karin's private tutoring she left? Problems at her middle school? At home? Why was Karin so intent on getting into that college? Did she know someone who'd be going there? Did her family go there? We don't know. We'll never* know. It could have been anything or nothing and you'll never know. All it leaves is an emptiness that consumes everything with "why."
In case you'd forgotten who Karin was to Kasumi, it should be clear before the end by her repetition of "dying." 6 times in 8 pages she says it. Enough to stand out in hindsight (foresight?) yet equally enough to be ignored in the present. Because while some things might jump out there's never really signs. It's in our nature to categorize and cleanly assign cause to effect but every now and then tragedy bares just how cold and unpredictable reality is. I'm reminded of this classic PSA.
There's a counter assumption that it's the happy ones, the social givers, the "privately sad clowns." Karin seemed to have fit that. She was socially unreserved and made friends with everyone in no time. She was also anxious about never fitting in when starting cram school late. Was that a sign? Was it simple nerves? Was it just a conversation starter? Maybe it's important to note Karin was the one who first brought up backup schools. Was she having regrets? Hoping Kasumi was the same as her?
You'll never know. You never get to know, and your human nature of seeking answers will eat you alive until you become too numb to think about it. Until every memory of her is steeped in the memory of what she did and not who she was. In Kasumi's memories, Karin isn't her good friend anymore. She's the girl who killed herself. Everything Karin did with her is done by the girl who killed herself. Every little conversation or moment shared is forever swallowed in the shadow of suicide. The girl who stole herself from everyone and maybe it was everyone's fault. You'll never know.
I said *never at the top because it's entirely possible we'll delve into Karin's circumstances. But right now this only seems to be a reminder. An explanation of who Kasumi is and what hangs over her. And I tried not to make too many assumptions but I think Kasumi carries a painful mix of feelings she can't sort because she can't find source or closure for. Maybe guilt, or resentment, or heartbreak on top of all the expected agony of loss.
Once again the visuals are sublime. The encroaching darkness that begins filling panels as Kasumi's stress takes hold. The barriers that go up between them as their struggle comes into view. The abstraction of Karin with every repetition, until it's only her cold stare telling Kasumi what she already knows. The cracking vase and the return of winter's coldness. There's an interesting phrase back in chapter 7 - 'reality and the past crashed over me like a torrent of ice water.' It's that same sensation here of a cold glass of water being dumped out and the once serene glass turning jagged and frantic. The plant it was holding is gone - whatever was blooming from it irrelevant as its nurturing purpose. In memory the glass no longer holds life; it's dominated by cold cruelty.
Part of why I love reading is the ability to dictate your pace. If this were animated, page 21 might be a quick cut of a few seconds. Or it might linger in slow motion. But it still needs to move on at the director's pace to fit a timeslot. In manga you get to stop and take it in. There's a sort of incredulity to the savage composition that braces you for Kasumi's reaction even as you might rather stay on it than turn the page. It's easier staying in the cold detachment than facing the damage.
Thankfully Kasumi found warmth in Haruyo. But I don't think we're done facing the damage yet.
In case you'd forgotten who Karin was to Kasumi, it should be clear before the end by her repetition of "dying." 6 times in 8 pages she says it. Enough to stand out in hindsight (foresight?) yet equally enough to be ignored in the present. Because while some things might jump out there's never really signs. It's in our nature to categorize and cleanly assign cause to effect but every now and then tragedy bares just how cold and unpredictable reality is. I'm reminded of this classic PSA.
There's a counter assumption that it's the happy ones, the social givers, the "privately sad clowns." Karin seemed to have fit that. She was socially unreserved and made friends with everyone in no time. She was also anxious about never fitting in when starting cram school late. Was that a sign? Was it simple nerves? Was it just a conversation starter? Maybe it's important to note Karin was the one who first brought up backup schools. Was she having regrets? Hoping Kasumi was the same as her?
You'll never know. You never get to know, and your human nature of seeking answers will eat you alive until you become too numb to think about it. Until every memory of her is steeped in the memory of what she did and not who she was. In Kasumi's memories, Karin isn't her good friend anymore. She's the girl who killed herself. Everything Karin did with her is done by the girl who killed herself. Every little conversation or moment shared is forever swallowed in the shadow of suicide. The girl who stole herself from everyone and maybe it was everyone's fault. You'll never know.
I said *never at the top because it's entirely possible we'll delve into Karin's circumstances. But right now this only seems to be a reminder. An explanation of who Kasumi is and what hangs over her. And I tried not to make too many assumptions but I think Kasumi carries a painful mix of feelings she can't sort because she can't find source or closure for. Maybe guilt, or resentment, or heartbreak on top of all the expected agony of loss.
Once again the visuals are sublime. The encroaching darkness that begins filling panels as Kasumi's stress takes hold. The barriers that go up between them as their struggle comes into view. The abstraction of Karin with every repetition, until it's only her cold stare telling Kasumi what she already knows. The cracking vase and the return of winter's coldness. There's an interesting phrase back in chapter 7 - 'reality and the past crashed over me like a torrent of ice water.' It's that same sensation here of a cold glass of water being dumped out and the once serene glass turning jagged and frantic. The plant it was holding is gone - whatever was blooming from it irrelevant as its nurturing purpose. In memory the glass no longer holds life; it's dominated by cold cruelty.
Part of why I love reading is the ability to dictate your pace. If this were animated, page 21 might be a quick cut of a few seconds. Or it might linger in slow motion. But it still needs to move on at the director's pace to fit a timeslot. In manga you get to stop and take it in. There's a sort of incredulity to the savage composition that braces you for Kasumi's reaction even as you might rather stay on it than turn the page. It's easier staying in the cold detachment than facing the damage.
Thankfully Kasumi found warmth in Haruyo. But I don't think we're done facing the damage yet.
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Apr 30, 2025
- Messages
- 76
...
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Nov 12, 2019
- Messages
- 1,761
This author really want to stick to the heavy subjects huh?
Out of the fire (sexual abuse by a form of authority) and into the frying pan (child suicide)!
The expression of Kasumi's absolute despair when she learned about Karin-san's death really got me. It nearly broke my heart to see her like that...
I really loved the imagery of the vase (?) cracking and finally breaking and flooding everything with water. I love that shit.
Much lighter topic but Yagate kimi ni naru did something very similar in the beetween-chapter illusrations using imagery of a cup overflowing with water when Yu confessed her feelings. I wonder if that inspired the author a bit.
Thank you very much as always for the scanlation. You're the best Beltaro!
Out of the fire (sexual abuse by a form of authority) and into the frying pan (child suicide)!
The expression of Kasumi's absolute despair when she learned about Karin-san's death really got me. It nearly broke my heart to see her like that...
I really loved the imagery of the vase (?) cracking and finally breaking and flooding everything with water. I love that shit.
Much lighter topic but Yagate kimi ni naru did something very similar in the beetween-chapter illusrations using imagery of a cup overflowing with water when Yu confessed her feelings. I wonder if that inspired the author a bit.
Thank you very much as always for the scanlation. You're the best Beltaro!
Last edited:
Testing bot, do not reply
- Joined
- Jan 25, 2026
- Messages
- 4,699
Damn! These kids are under a lot of pressure 
Thanks for the chapter!
Thanks for the chapter!
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Jan 8, 2023
- Messages
- 934
Kasumi's face in the last panel is haunting.
I don't think I've seen a mangaka portray such visceral, ugly, despair like that before.
A freeze frame of loss and horror...
Accompanied only by the tinkle of shattered glass.
I don't think I've seen a mangaka portray such visceral, ugly, despair like that before.
A freeze frame of loss and horror...
Accompanied only by the tinkle of shattered glass.
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Mar 27, 2023
- Messages
- 433
I love this series to death but I personally cant handle suicide as a plot device no matter how tastefully done it is in the story. I really hope our little heroine's story has an eventual happy ending see that shes with a person she loves.
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Jan 3, 2025
- Messages
- 192
Went to go like the raws and the next part is rough too poor Kasumi
poor Kasumi
Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- May 13, 2019
- Messages
- 1,050
That last panel pierced right through my soul. Ouch
Fed-Kun's army
- Joined
- Jun 19, 2026
- Messages
- 16
Japan's affiliate schools are pretty messed up. They shift the stress of university admissions down to middle school kids who feel their life is over from failing one exam.
Last edited:
Double-page supporter
- Joined
- Aug 16, 2025
- Messages
- 64
We finally talked about this
Similar threads
