Henkyou no Roukishi - Bard Loen - Vol. 4 Ch. 17 - Cleaver Blade
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I was so sad when this stopped getting translated thanks so much to everyone involved! Comfy adventures with Bard are back on the menu boys!
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@silverden maybe that's unsheathed Excelia
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Can he bear the brunt of the demon?
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It’s back, and Bard has a holy executioner sword? Aw yis
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@Lynia
Some of the dialogue (technically, monologue) in this chapter felt like the editor tried to make it sound dignified but repeatedly stumbled over themself in the process. The fact that there was visible effort involved actually makes it more painful. Page 7 is a good example (there's more of this later in the chapter as well).
[ol][li]"The workmanship of the pattern is rather gaudy..." is both nonsensical and overly complicated. An object can be gaudy, a design/look/appearance, etc., can be gaudy. Workmanship is the measure of quality or complexity of work; it can be poor/superior/nonexistent/exquisite, etc., but not gaudy. The word "pattern" there also feels out of place; a pattern is a repeating sequence (I have not read the raws, but if the original word there was パターン, remember to never transliterate it blindly; this is one of the many devious loanwords which sound the same but don't have the same meaning in Japanese as they do in their original language), so what is shown there clearly doesn't match what is being said. I suggest leaving it at "The design of the hilt is rather gaudy" since you aren't adding anything meaningful at this point—only needless confusion.
[li]"The tip of the blade has been cut horizontally..." should probably be "cut at a right angle", since the horizontality of the cut doesn't persist when the sword is oriented differently.
[li]"This reduces it to simply a flat chunk of patterned metal", again, the word "pattern" here most likely refers to its design, not an actual pattern, and the word "flat" feels odd because it's normal for blades to be flat (I suspect you meant the blunt tip there, but it doesn't read like that—at least not immediately). The use of "simply" there is not technically wrong, but leads to a poor sentence flow. Try "a mere slab of decorated metal".[/ol]
tl;dr elegant simplicity > sesquipedalian gibberish
(Also, p. 43: "If I doge this", lol)
(Also also, caulnuts are most likely modeled after sweet chestnuts; Bard's description matches them perfectly.)
Some of the dialogue (technically, monologue) in this chapter felt like the editor tried to make it sound dignified but repeatedly stumbled over themself in the process. The fact that there was visible effort involved actually makes it more painful. Page 7 is a good example (there's more of this later in the chapter as well).
[ol][li]"The workmanship of the pattern is rather gaudy..." is both nonsensical and overly complicated. An object can be gaudy, a design/look/appearance, etc., can be gaudy. Workmanship is the measure of quality or complexity of work; it can be poor/superior/nonexistent/exquisite, etc., but not gaudy. The word "pattern" there also feels out of place; a pattern is a repeating sequence (I have not read the raws, but if the original word there was パターン, remember to never transliterate it blindly; this is one of the many devious loanwords which sound the same but don't have the same meaning in Japanese as they do in their original language), so what is shown there clearly doesn't match what is being said. I suggest leaving it at "The design of the hilt is rather gaudy" since you aren't adding anything meaningful at this point—only needless confusion.
[li]"The tip of the blade has been cut horizontally..." should probably be "cut at a right angle", since the horizontality of the cut doesn't persist when the sword is oriented differently.
[li]"This reduces it to simply a flat chunk of patterned metal", again, the word "pattern" here most likely refers to its design, not an actual pattern, and the word "flat" feels odd because it's normal for blades to be flat (I suspect you meant the blunt tip there, but it doesn't read like that—at least not immediately). The use of "simply" there is not technically wrong, but leads to a poor sentence flow. Try "a mere slab of decorated metal".[/ol]
tl;dr elegant simplicity > sesquipedalian gibberish
(Also, p. 43: "If I doge this", lol)
(Also also, caulnuts are most likely modeled after sweet chestnuts; Bard's description matches them perfectly.)
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