What a cooinkydink, she discovers dozens of lewds of hersef on your hardrive. You don't recall putting them there, but the judge won't believe that.
Maybe you shouldn't have joked about having information that would lead to the arrest of DNC-chan.
Oh, there's certainly some illegal activity going on here! A goosestepping loli bitch broke into my house and trampled all over my civil rights. I am sure the Supreme Court would LOVE to hear about this.