PSA: 'Lover' is not a good translation of 恋人 'koibito'

[sjiveru]

Basically what the title says. English lover, at least to my native-speaker ears, implies not only a sexual relationship, but also one that probably shouldn't be happening (e.g. 'someone you're having an affair with'). Japanese koibito has none of those implications, and pretty much just means 'someone you're in a romantic relationship with'. English doesn't really have a good single equivalent of koibito, but I'd suggest 'boyfriend'/'girlfriend' as the primary choice and maybe others (e.g. 'significant other') if they make more sense.

I would say that English lover is closer to Japanese 愛人 aijin than it is to koibito. I'm not 100% sure that I would ever actually use lover; if I did, it would be exclusively in the context of an affair.

 

[kajarainbow]

I've never heard of "lover is only used to refer to affairs" as a rule, and I'm a native English speaker. Lover does tend to imply a sexual relationship, though.

 

[cmertb]

The correct translation of 恋人 will always depend on the exact context, and "lover" is an acceptable choice in certain contexts.

 

[BzzBzz]

> to my native-speaker ears

Are you sure?

lover
noun
A partner in a sexual OR romantic relationship outside marriage.

 

[gomichandesu]

Uh, my native ears have always known lover as just being someone who you're sexual with. Not inherently adulterous.

 

[cmertb]

If we're pulling out dictionaries here: https://www.dictionary.com/browse/lover?s=t

Only 1 out of 5 definitions overall, and 1 out of 3 that involve romantic relationships, mentions extramarital affairs.

 

[justforthelulz]

This Public Service Announcement quickly turned into a Public Roast LMAO

 

[Yatsuki]

I asked my native speaker friends from Canada, NZ, US, and England, and they confirmed "lover" = have sexual relation, but not necessary adultery. It can be via context though.

Edit: Just to add bf or gf is gender-specific, so actually lover works well when you want to hide the gender of your partner which Japanese manga use a lot because they just love that ambiguity. Same as when they use "ano ko" instead of specifically pointing out if the subject is male/female

 

[bigtiddyoneesan]

Yeah. The word 'partner' is similar to 'lover' in that it's gender-neutral, but I'd say that 'lover' has a more passionate connotation.