Ya'll saying you actually like the air of suspense, but I actually dislike it.
When the story itself heavily suggests that the MC's lucky break is all an illusion, a pointless farce -- there's no satisfaction to be had from anything he achieves or experiences.
Instead, I feel like we're only slowly awaiting the moment in which the MC nearly achieves all that he wished to, he is one step away from the peak -- and then he wakes up in his mother's house, with all of his achievements thrown out to the bin.
What am I supposed to feel then? "Yay"?
Currently, it feels like a train wreck that's being played in slow motion. You are certain it is going to happen, it'd just take a while. I can't really seeing myself reading this thing in the long-run at all. It just feels depressing.