Enjoyed the old english. Must have taken a good amount of effort to think of these phrases. Good job! It makes it a much more entertaining read, and it fits quite well with the theme of the manga. Hope to see more soon.
It's a complete rewrite and clearly not inline with the author's intent. It doesn't fit at all. Your only exposure to Roman culture is Shakespeare so you decided everything should be viewed through that lens in middle English and melodramatic poetry.
Happy to see this manga got pickup, but as non-native, I find this old english rather hard to chew. Please make 2 version if possible or just use modern english with tl note if historical context needed.