Shousetsu Toukou Saito o Riyou Shite Itara, Kurasu no Bishoujo ga Dokusha datta - Vol. 1 Ch. 1

[MangaDex]

 

[Eonlars]

"The only thing I liked about this shit was the threat part so I shall follow it for now."
-Eonlars

 

[TheFiller]

i saw this in the manga raw website and this was not bad ... i hope for more and your work is good

 

[Dintsu]

Dunno if the translator reads this, but thanks for the translation.
One major thing, heroine, not heroin.
Heroine is a person. Heroin is a drug.

 

[RookieXL]

@Soseki thank you for your work!

 

[Soseki]

@Dintsu Thank you for the correction. Already, fixed the typo.

 

[rhino36]

Don't use a type font for stuff like dialog, yse a comic font (and not comic sans)

 

[Soseki]

@thefiller Thanks, hopefully it gets better over time

 

[Soseki]

@rhino36 any recommendations?

 

[Babiapalah]

you have my thanks for this ! keep up the good work!

 

[Kimzark]

well it looks rather clean for the first time, so good job. ive seen other works that actually hurt the eyes while watching, but this one was definitely readable without any major problems. just dont give up (and dont be like Mc who cant take criticism ) and keep improving, and im sure you'll have a nice future in the this area.
now about the story... MC is a douche bag (and not only on chapter 2 lol)... but we will see what happens from now on... i cant go higher than 7/10 with only one chapter due to how dis likable was the MC. I have no idea how he will end up with an harem with that crappy narcissistic personality, but i guess thats the power of manga. about the premise... nothing out of the ordinary. Also fMC looks like your typical goody good girl without any special features (for now at least).
I'll give this a shot anyway and hope the story improves with time.

 

[bakmiekuah]

mc retarded, that girl was right

 

[Callidus]

"200 people have read my story! That means I'm super famous and nobody hates it! GAH! Someone left a bad review! I can't believe my perfect story has a bad review! This person must be wrong!"

Actually, I feel like there are probably a lot of fanfic "authors" out there that have this type of mindset. Hopefully this guy will change soon though, cause right now he's just annoying and full of himself.

 

[siscon]

I meant, she isn't wrong.

 

[DarkFlame]

this mc is so delusional🤣
1st chapter felt more like a oneshot but not bad for a start.

 

[pip25]

People are a bit hard on the MC. It is difficult to view a negative review as constructive criticism when all you've received was praise so far and, well... the reviewer does not exactly mince words. Actually, it is more like she is venting her frustrations instead of offering advice. She has the right of course, but the MC likewise has the right to be annoyed by her - and that's where things would normally end, if they hadn't met in real life as well. The fact that they did is an interesting twist and I can't wait to find out what'll happen after this. The story can still go horribly wrong from here, but it has potential.

 

[Bakaman]

Thank you for the translation Soseki, I enjoyed it ! This manga caught my interest, I'll be following it.

 

[mrmm]

the MC become idiot too I guess

 

[endo54]

the mc is already an idiot in chapter 1

 

[naeon]

@pip25 the problem for me is that he tried to blackmail her. It's not about being hard on the MC, but if it actually happened it would actually affect the girl's life. Sure it may be a bluff, but it may not be.
Even if it's a romcom still doesn't change the fact that threatening someone to dox them on the internet for a dumb and selfish reason is incredibly disturbing, even if the associated story he would've wrote is not true. Delusional creeps are everywhere and if he actually publish the story, she'll be harassed. Heck in another timeline it's a plot where the MC could use the threat to have his way with her.