What you are saying is correct but put yourself in his place..he wasn't ready to meet his birth mother until recently and when he went he found this poor child, You think it's easy for him to go and meet that woman?
I think if she wasn't his mother it will be easier for him to talk with her about this issue
The sad part, it's hard because it's our modern society. In older society, kids naturally made communities with each other once they reached a certain age (still kids), so they didn't need their parents to actually be with them except to give them food and teach them stuff and talk only when necessary.
Human society isn't designed for humans anymore, it's designed for ideals that aren't able to be met for most people.