Dex-chan lover
- Joined
- Aug 18, 2018
- Messages
- 3,542
Most issues have already been addressed. A MC that has sex without hesitation is preferable to some good-guy, trapped in the "I don't wanna hurt anybodies feelings and be a gentleman. I have several girls inteested in me, so I don't take on any girl"-zone. But this free maid was really sudden freebee. It would have felt better for the readers, if we would get offered some reason, why she did it. I go with, "She actually wants to manipulate MC into helping the empire. Restoring his magic on the side to secure him as an asset and strengthen him again, deals with two problems at once." This works out nicely for me.
Then again other major flaw of the plot, the MC's naive stupidity, well that's....really hard to turn around. I really get, why the mood of so many readers is soured by that. I like the "So I get closure." part, yet I'd like him to be a little bit more pissed off at the princess. She nearly killed him, maybe even intentionally and not just as a collateral. She is a ruler, but fuels a war, which brings about the death of many people. It would be justifiable to end her asap, even without hearing any reasons from her. The MC actually didn't display any overblown naivety til now. Him wanting to hear her reason, shows a dangerous tendency towards it, but depending on the situation he might NOT ask her, when she still as a chance for a comeback in a battle, but she is utterly beaten. Of course something surprising will happen and she gets away, but that wouldn't be MC fault then.
This story rises and falls with the naivety level of the MC's deeds, seen in the next chapters. The Story isn't very good, but still salvageable.
Then again other major flaw of the plot, the MC's naive stupidity, well that's....really hard to turn around. I really get, why the mood of so many readers is soured by that. I like the "So I get closure." part, yet I'd like him to be a little bit more pissed off at the princess. She nearly killed him, maybe even intentionally and not just as a collateral. She is a ruler, but fuels a war, which brings about the death of many people. It would be justifiable to end her asap, even without hearing any reasons from her. The MC actually didn't display any overblown naivety til now. Him wanting to hear her reason, shows a dangerous tendency towards it, but depending on the situation he might NOT ask her, when she still as a chance for a comeback in a battle, but she is utterly beaten. Of course something surprising will happen and she gets away, but that wouldn't be MC fault then.
This story rises and falls with the naivety level of the MC's deeds, seen in the next chapters. The Story isn't very good, but still salvageable.