The Fragrant Flower Blooms With Dignity - Vol. 9 Ch. 64 - Something Important

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Man, I'm annoyed they're having him undo his hair. It feels like he's conforming to the expected, rather than letting his individuality shine.
The reason he started dyeing his hair was not his individuality, he was inspired by someone else. He grew and his circumstances changed, so he might not need that emotional backstop anymore. Did he stop liking it? Probably not. But he doesn't need props to like himself anymore.
 
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I really like this chapter and the moment between the two but cannot say I feel the slightest okay with Rintaro dying his hair. The undertone here is still that dying your hair, essentially standing out from the norms, is a taboo that causes trouble for yourself and those around you. Nothing about your appearance should be a matter of "strong" or "weak" or protecting each other (so long as we aren't pushing the extremes and straight up streaking). He shouldn't have to make compromises to conform to others narrowminded beliefs about appearances.

I recently got to go to Japan for a bit and there's something seriously depressing about asking the people I met about school uniforms in anime thinking "okay this has to be dramatized; there's no way it be that bad." and then going “oh crap it’s worse.” The uniform policy is way past the point of being ridiculous and is frankly dehumanizing. I mean when a dress code for grade school students describes how long their finger nails can be, there’s a big problem. Like the very fact its assume blonde hair is dyed is indicative of systematic bias.

I can’t help but be infuriated by this situation and the fact that it’s something normal and acceptable by Japanese societal standards. I understand different cultures have different values, but a kid really should not be dealing with this much pressure just on the color of their hair. At the very least not from other students. Its insane to me that I’m watching diversity campaigns push for businesses to stop discriminating against black hair styles and embrace non traditional (well, white) hair styles, and reading a fantastically uplifting story where the main character chooses to stop dying their hair blonde (like one of the most boring and generic hair colors out there (no offense to anyone with blonde hair)) as a moment to “strength” to stand on common ground and help his girlfriend, who doesn’t care and rather appreciates where his feelings to dye his hair comes from, deal with the ideas of narrowminded high school girls who have essentially been brainwashed to be prejudiced to others appearance by an awful educational staff.

I know Rintaro himself said he doesn’t mind and wouldn’t hesitate but I know enough about dying hair (I don’t do myself though) to know it’s an active choice. If had gotten bored or it or couldn’t be bothered to deal with it he’d have stopped long ago snd let it fade (maybe not going back his natural color but definitely not keeping it completely blonde). And going back to black had to be an active choice and with the reason given of wanting to protect it just feels… wrong. This isn’t for himself or directly for any of his loved ones. Its appease outsiders and limit their negative perceptions of people he associates with which is so… disgusting (morally or ethically or I don’t really know but I hate it).
 
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The reason he started dyeing his hair was not his individuality, he was inspired by someone else. He grew and his circumstances changed, so he might not need that emotional backstop anymore. Did he stop liking it? Probably not. But he doesn't need props to like himself anymore.
I think this would come across a lot better if the circumstances and timing was different. All we are are inspirations from other people. That’s how we develop (or at least partly but thats more of a psychologists and/or philosopher’s debate). We internalize how we view others and ours responses to that become reflected in our personality. Overtime as we engage and interact with others more this is shaped continuously (especially for minors), but in all stages its our individual personality. Most of what any of us do is learned from others or because we saw someone else do it and want to capture that within ourselves. And then why we keep doing or stop doing those things also says a lot.

Honestly, I could see a great character moment if he just felt it was unnecessary or woke up one morning and didn’t feel like redoing the dye and realized he didn’t have to anymore because he has people that’ll love him no matter how he looks and that’s all that matters. My issue is him doing this in direct response to the girls finding out about their relationship in an attempt to mitigate damage. This just feels like the exact opposite of when Miyamura started dressing lighter and felt more comfortable showing off his piercings (and metaphorically being more open with his personality) and even then I still think this could have been a fantastic character moment in an antithesis way of saying “I don’t need to go to all this trouble to be known when I’m already known by the people I care about” if the circumstances and motivations were different because dying your hair is an active choice that has to be continuously made as opposed to something like piercings or tattoos which are a one time choice and then pretty stably there unless you make a separate active (and painful) choice to remove them.

That said the only think I actually take offense to is the idea of hair color as a prop. I mean, its no more a prop than clothing choice or nail polish, in which case if the individual likes them… why no wear them? That’s just where I don’t like this. The only reason anyone should dye their hair to begin with is because they like how it looks dyed… I mean it’s intrinsically a choice about your appearance. If he likes it, then he should keep doing it. The idea he’s making some grand decision by not doing something he likes when it doesn’t harm anyone else (physically or emotionally) is just beyond me.

… and I really need to log off before I send a page long rant to every comment I see justifying his decision (because its just not okay that he’s even had to make this decision concerning something as realistically inconsequential as hair dye (I mean this would be the equivalent of if I stopped painting my nails (something I do because its fun and creative and I like how they look despite the ***** it is doing it myself) not because I don’t want to but because other people talk bad about it and it starts rumors about the people I spend time with)).
 
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Man, I'm annoyed they're having him undo his hair. It feels like he's conforming to the expected, rather than letting his individuality shine.
Not necessarily. Its not like anyone is forcing him to. If this is what he wants, thats not conforming. If anything, its the same thing as when he died it blonde in the first place. He just wanted to 🤷‍♂️
 
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Not necessarily. Its not like anyone is forcing him to. If this is what he wants, thats not conforming. If anything, its the same thing as when he died it blonde in the first place. He just wanted to 🤷‍♂️
I wouldn't say it was 100% because he wanted to - yes, he did it of his own volition, but the goal is to make him less intimidating for Kaoruko's friends by removing an attribute that is heavily stigmatized and stereotyped. The fine point is that doing so is no longer taking away an emotional support from him.
 
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That said the only think I actually take offense to is the idea of hair color as a prop. I mean, its no more a prop than clothing choice or nail polish, in which case if the individual likes them… why no wear them? That’s just where I don’t like this. The only reason anyone should dye their hair to begin with is because they like how it looks dyed… I mean it’s intrinsically a choice about your appearance. If he likes it, then he should keep doing it. The idea he’s making some grand decision by not doing something he likes when it doesn’t harm anyone else (physically or emotionally) is just beyond me.
To play devil's advocate: "why not wear them" - for the same reason he can't wear a black Metallica shirt with torn jeans and nose piercings - schools tend to have dress codes, be they a strict uniform or just guidelines for what should not be worn. Dying your hair in bright colors that are starkly different from your original hair color is very similar to wearing flashy clothing. Had he been naturally blond and forced to dye his hair black to conform, that'd be a whole other thing, but this is basically the same as dressing in a socially-acceptable to form a positive first impression - and his first impression is already in tatters.
 

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