Tbh, the rp trope is off-putting. The first bl I stumbled into through the gender bender route (cherry something?) was merciless with that shit. I was so grossed out I avoided anything "yaoi" like a plague. It's honestly novels that got me to give the genre a second chance.
But it's not the up-fuckery that gets me, I love horrors and sht, it's when you can tell the author isn't aware of how messed up their sht is.