Anata ga Shitekurenakute mo - Ch. 47

[kiero13]

"there's nothing more foolish than a hysterical woman"

Good, good, kaede. You're doing fine at keeping yourself. Take it step by step. Don't be a karen.

As for michi, it'd be a lot easier if she were to blame it all on her husband. She wouldn't have done it if it weren't for him anyway. Then let bygones be bygones. But yeah easier said than done.

Oh, just to add an opinion here I think no home-wrecking was done. Both marriages were already falling apart. It'd be true if there was a child involved though.

 

[SleepyAbra]

@yumian Nina actual has already caused a lot of damage to Michi’s relationship with You. He was able to show her a new relationship filled with the emotional connection she needed. As opposed to the (then) stick in the mud You.

Also can you please point me to which chapter shows Nina never being in love with Kaede? Cause he was shown to be very attentive and caring of their relationship in the flashbacks.

 

[Desireless]

I have mixed feelings about Michi's reaction towards Kaeda. It was honestly a bit disappointing to see Michi being more envious of Kaeda as a competitor that she doesn't feel like she can beat, rather than regret, shame or compassion. I guess I was expecting more since I viewed Michi as a sympathetic character up till now. Also, I believe she will confess to You about the affair, which will cause him to admit to his own.

I see lots of people still hate You with a passion. I believe that yes, he initially acted differently towards Michi out of guilt for cheating, but when he saw that even small changes made such a big difference he genuinely started to change. Although he only started helping out with the cooking out of guilt, and he could go back to not doing so after Michi passed her exam, you can see in this chapter that he actually seems to be cooking with enjoyment. It has also been demonstrated that he had adopted a very detached personality as a way of coping with people since long ago, and both Michi and Mishima confronted him about it, making him release how deeply he could hurt others by being this way. At least we have seen repeatedly that he regrets the cheating. Michi also cheated, and up until now she hasn't really been shown to regret it much. Point being they both cheated, both are guilty, yet all people ever do is bash You for cheating and wish for Michi to find out about it as if she is some innocent saint. A weird double standard.

Anyway, I believe the story is definitely going towards both couples divorcing, and I am sure Michi and Makoto won't be getting together at once after that happens. Most likely they will go their separate ways for a while, Makoto going to work for a different company and Michi focusing on herself and her career. They will meet after a few years again and then end up becoming a couple "properly" this time.


@kiero13 lmao do you even know what being "a karen" means?? 😂 Or do you just call any woman who has any sort of emotional response other than what you deem acceptable for "a karen"? What do you call an angry man then? The woman recently discovered her husband had an affair, it is fresh as a newly cut wound, she has all the right in the world to be mad, and even "hysterical" if she wants to. Your comment really just confirms the bias that the author makes the reader aware of, that women arent allowed to express their emotions without being labelled one thing or the other. How about women are just human beings with regular, human emotions? Is that too difficult and bothersome to comprehend? People these days just absorp any terms they see on the internet and dish them out whenever they see an opportunity, not even bothering about the definition or meaning behind.

 

[Mamabear78]

All I know is that if You gets pissed at Michi, I’m going to reach through the Manga and smack him.

Both marriages had things that needed to be worked on. Michi wanted to work on their marriage work, You didn’t. Nina wanted to work on his marriage, Kaede didn’t. Now the roles have almost reversed? It seems. I think all four need to figure out what they want and start to communicate. My personal opinion is that they all need to start fresh. Whether that’s getting to know their partners all over again or starting a relationship with someone new.

 

[yumian]

@Minamimaru I did. It's dying alright, but was still fine. It was Michi's appearance who encouraged him to cheat on his wife. "He was more prompt to cheat than Michi" whitewashing Michi aren't we? It takes two to tango. I have to disagree about Kaede. To me, she got hit the hardest just because she's not mc, while Michi got to be happy and have the love of two men.

 

[yumian]

@SleepyAbra Not really. From what I've read so far, Michi's marriage remained the same or maybe a lil bit better. You tried to make up from the one-night stand affair by trying to help around and spend more time with Michi, and Michi is not pushy like before and shift her focus on her job instead. On the other hand, Nina's marriage is slowly deteriorating after the affair, and may never make up with his wife anymore.

It was in older chapter. It seemed that he only married Kaede because he admired her, not because he loves her. Sure he was very attentive and caring for her, but does not mean love. Compared that to what he feels towards Michi, which is what we called romantic love.

 

[Qira_adan]

Wow so many righteous person in comment section by trying to tell which one at fault and which one was the victim, suddenly everyone like had an experience about cheating on their own married life lol

 

[Minamimaru]

@yumian how can you say that their marriage was fine? Make a marriage work takes two people. In Niina's case he was the only one trying and Kaede kept shut him down. It is not because she didn't cheat she is not in the wrong also. And I am not whitewhashing Michi it just the truth. She kept having doubts while Niina, after the fiasco of his wedding anniversary, was done with his marriage.
You are describing Kaede as if she is the only innocent victim in this manga when it isn't the case. If Niina married her because he admired her we can say the same for Kaede. She married him because he was supportive of her, there is not trace of love between them. Otherwise she would have find the time to at least talk with him.
What starts the story was the fact that both Michi's and Niina's marriage were lacking an important part of a marriage the emotional connection and affection you got for your partner

 

[kiero13]

@Desireless wow uhh I guess you got too emotional to forget what "hysterical" means. I said that "karen" part as to emphasize her quote about hysterical women which are destructive and completely doesn't care about how much their destructive actions impact everyone even herself. Also as a half meant joke.

Or what? You want her to go hysterical? What good does going hysterical do? She'd completely lose herself and, like the woman who filed a lawsuit against mishima, be lifeless. She can file a lawsuit against her husband and michi, get angry and shout at them all she wants, but don't get completely eaten by it.

I didn't mean anything other than that. It was just me wanting good for the character I like. No bias or whatsoever you said. Don't assume stuff on me or put words on my mouth, random person on the internet 😃

Oh, also about the "What do you call an angry man then?", They're called greg. Did a google search for that. Like the other comment said, don't act so righteous. You probably labeled someone as a joke once in your life.

 

[Desireless]

@kiero13 That is absolutely not what being "a karen" means, it is not just any random hysterical women that is "destructive". People in deep sense of grief can get hysterical, people with illnesses can become hysterical, it is the reason for your hysteria that matters. It is used to refer to women who act in an obnoxious, arrogant, entitled and demanding beyond what you can reasonably expect, usually over completely ridiculous stuff. What do you classify as "hysterical" behaviour when someone finds out their husband cheated? Kaeda's thinking that she has to stay calm and not make any mistakes, so as to not seems as a hysterical women, clearly shows that there is little women can do and say before they are deemed "hysterical" by people. Until now Kaeda's response to the cheating has actually been completely abnormal, this is not what most people act like at all when they find out they've been cheated on. You wrote that she's doing fine at "keeping yourself. take it step by step. Don't be a karen", as if her not acting all prim and proper and actually letting out some of whats boiling inside of her will make her out to be a karen. I just say that is not true, and the use of the term "karen" is completely misplased even if she were to act out. Also, in my post I am talking about the general bias of society, it's not all about you, no need to get so defensive. Also, never actually seen anyone use the term "greg" before, a term that so to speak is almost never used because guys are allowed to feel and act out as much as they want. While believe me, I have seen people use the term "karen" literally thousands of times. That already tells me enough about society.

 

[yumian]

@Minamimaru Their marriage was still fine before the affair okay. They can still make up back then, but not anymore after Nina fell for Michi. And yes, you and majority of the readers kept on whitewashing the actual cheating couple. It's sickening. Denied it all you want, but Kaede IS the only innocent victim in the series. Unlike the other three, she didn't cheat on her spouse at all. Her only mistake was to take Nina's for granted. Kaede can't help it if her job demands too much of her time okay (or else what would the author use as excuse for Nina's failing marriage, and make the readers support the cheating couple?). That shouldn't justify the cheating. And Kaede does loves Nina.

On the other hand, why is it that Nina have lots of free time anyway. Not even a hobby to occupy his time. "Lacking an important part of a marriage the emotional connection and affection you got for your partner" shouldn't be use as an excuse to cheat on your spouse, no matter what. Either you talk it out with your spouse, seek help from counsellor, or just divorce. Only cowards would seek to have an affair instead.

 

[kiero13]

@Desireless hysterical, inability to control emotions = uncontrollable. The "karen" meme can also be considered as so aggressive they do stuff without thinking = uncontrollable. Regardless, I still think you misunderstood as I already said that she can get angry, cry or even punch niina's balls. So what's up with the "letting out some of whats boiling inside of her will make her out to be a karen"? Nope. Already said previously that I never meant that.

Kaede's abnormal? Maybe you missed the part where she's aloof in her job, cries in the restroom and in her bed, and shutting niina off when he admitted. Kaede's logical and I think her not wanting to make mistakes are for saving their marriage and to get promoted in her job, not about her image. That's normal. If you're idea of normal is to be unstable she couldn't do her job, or do a michi headhunt, that depends on their personality but still pretty unhealthy. So I don't want her to get hysterical. Story-wise too, I don't want her to get more hate than she already has here lmao. Well, just my opinion/preference. If it's my preference you don't like, hmm I don't think it will change for now.

Lastly, thanks for clarifying that your social analysis was for a general one. It was part of your reply to me so yeah I assumed on that part. Well, that's all the years in patriarchy's fault and it became like instinct to everyone.

 

[Artemis04]

First of all everyone is using the term "Karen" wrong. It's pretty much an entitled white women who gets off on threatening black folks. Please stop with the misinterpretation. At the end of the day no one really deserves sympathy. Everyone except for Kaede cheated outside of their marriages. Unless you consider work-cheating to be a thing.

 

[SunnyD88]

Fuck everyone except for Niina

 

[Banhchuoi]

Lol I absolutely hate everyone except Kaede. She is the only one still try hard to put the marriage together even Niina has to admit that, Niina just labeled her as she'll won't listen or be there for him, or she'll leave him if he act as a nuisance. That's not it and that's not how marriage works either. After all the labeling and went off cheating he realized that too late. I don't even want to touch You and Michi since they both are d*ckheads in relationships.

Exactly there are too many expectations for how a marriage should be that burdening Niina and Kaede. For example: if a woman works too much and loves her job to not being able to handle BOTH house work and her occupation, it irks problems and somehow the marriage start to be labeled as problematic. I give kudos to Niina for being considerate and share the task with her. Working too much is also unhealthy and Kaede may should have talk it out sooner, their marriage is still able to be mended at that point. But Niina just gotta label things in his own mind and looking for consolation elsewhere.