This... this hurts. Alan loved Douglas. Douglas was like his second father. And to see that father just throw himself into danger time and time again, just to the point that he might go beyond the point where he might actually die, it was too much for Alan to bear. All Alan wanted was just for his second dad to just live a life of peace.
It just... went so wrong.
Alan had nothing but the best of intentions. But maybe, more than anything, what Alan should have done, is talk to Douglas. Let the emotions out instead of using a roundabout way that only hurts more.