Chocolate Sexy Bitch - Oneshot

[MangaDex]

 

[SkyLova]

i laughed and i cringed(a little), gg good.

 

[Late_Komei]

What an eye catching title.

 

[JustForKIcks2]

A bit crude, but I think the author's got the right stuff to make a compelling narrative someday. Keep at it!

 

[saisoY]

funny fun fire 🔥🔥🐻🍫

 

[Orangechrisy]

Art, pages 10-15 especially. Go get her you big booty bitch

 

[darekpawlo]

A lot less self-inserting for the future

 

[Mute2732]

Everyones giving good criticism so I'm gonna be honest this sucks. It's like if a shitty 3 or 4 panel tumblr comic got stretched out way too long. The way one character goes from crying about trauma to being turned on instantly screams this was written by young and lacking in real relationships. I used to do edgy wannabe smut writing when I was 14, it was just like this. I can excuse the art, art takes talent and effort but the writing you just need to experience more life or just give it more drafts. There's potential just none of it is really here in this comic

 

[Hazargus]

Everyone’s giving good criticism so I'm gonna be honest this sucks. It's like if a shitty 3 or 4 panel tumblr comic got stretched out way too long. The way one character goes from crying about trauma to being turned on instantly screams this was written by young and lacking in real relationships. I used to do edgy wannabe smut writing when I was 14, it was just like this. I can excuse the art, art takes talent and effort but the writing you just need to experience more life or just give it more drafts. There's potential just none of it is really here in this comic

out of all the comments I really like yours the best because it’s just pumping me up to make something more planned out and better but not any romance bullshit because I have literally no experience in that field. I was lowkey in a trance when I made this without really putting much thought into it but now that I’m looking at it I really wanna delete it 😭😭😭. I’m usually babied with positive comments but this one just opened my mind way more, I’ll try to make something that’s more cool and less edgy just for you👍.

 

[Mute2732]

out of all the comments I really like yours the best because it’s just pumping me up to make something more planned out and better but not any romance bullshit because I have literally no experience in that field. I was lowkey in a trance when I made this without really putting much thought into it but now that I’m looking at it I really wanna delete it 😭😭😭. I’m usually babied with positive comments but this one just opened my mind way more, I’ll try to make something that’s more cool and less edgy just for you👍.

Read more and live more, you'll get it and make a masterpiece eventually that way. I didn't know shit about romance until I got a girlfriend and even now I'm winging it after being with the same woman for years. Just gotta write about what you know

 

[woogzs]

i love chocolate sexy bitch! That definitely was a chocolate sexy bitch! gao! gao!