What do you wish for?? For you and your friends to be immortal or what???
And do you think he's that much dumb to not know that you can kill his relations???
I'm with Chumbo. I get wanting to be creative, but if that's what the author wrote, leave it alone. Nobody gives a crap how you FEEL about it. Just make a joke page about alternate names if you hate it so much. You do with everything else.
Same here, the reason favor scanlations and fansubs over official translation is exactaly that kind of bullshit. I'm hwre here for translations, not "localizations".