If you're trying to praise someone, the word "surprising" is seldom appropriate.
I'm with the maid on the relationships. Immediately going for who's on top is crass.
It's why "traps" and "twinks" are seen as more acceptable than Yaoi design guys which look like actual obvious men, and not just characters drawn as girls that are then called men.
I find that distinction kind of funny, since yaoi guys are basically a male and a female character slotted into bishie bodies. And they act about as male as a teenage girl imagines. In what I've read yaoi characters (and to a somewhat lesser degree "reverse" harem characters) go much harder at their stereotypes than yuri characters, or standard female harem characters (well, depending on writing quality in the latter case). Some of that is probably because yuri, as you mentioned, is a bit closer to what's accepted as normal, and with a greater general acceptance they get more exposure which leads to a greater variation.
Personally I don't like those heavily formulaic character types either way, although they can still be written well, or just hit right. Or be interesting despite that.