My First Love Was a Beautiful "Girl" - Vol. 3 Ch. 13

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"Today's the start of October!"
Probably-not-so-coincidentally, the chapter, unlucky 13, was fittingly released at the very end of October.
 
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I understand he's struggling on his feelings and genders, but he was a jerk on that.
 
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Ushikawa...

You still wear that locket (and as far as I rmb) it still has a picture of Ryuugasaki in it.

Ya aint fooling anyone
 
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@kiero13 Tbh I cant blame the MC.

Ryu, apart from being a massive narcissist, is also constantly hitting the same key whit the MC and never really takes into consideration his feelings since ch.1 and basically only has his priority's on the club and himself. Being a massive annoyance, specially now while MC has plenty on his mind, obviously becomes annoying to the point of making him snap, and even after doing so, plus, its clear that Ryu didn't really meant the apology he gave, caring more about the fact that MC said he wasn't beautiful because of how much work he puts on himself rather then caring about the MC.

In all honesty Ryu has as much of a shitty personality as he has looks, I bet if Ryu was actually a good guy MC would be much less conflicted by now.
 
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i mean the guy only really got pissed after ryuugasaki said him falling in love was a pain so him blowing up is understandable even if he was a little rude
 
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@I_I_Hope_I_I I think you're being unfair to Ryuu. Ryuu's initial reaction upon seeing Ushikawa in chapter 1 was very positive, and not self involved at all. He says things like "I can't believe how tall you've gotten" and "I guess you've become quite the ladies man." Ryuu only began making exaggerated "I'm so beautiful" comments in response Ushikawa's yelling about Ryuu's crossdressing. And that sort of mockery seems like a reasonable response, especially given how obvious it is that Ushikawa's bigotry is to mask his feelings for Ryuu. If you want to understand Ryuu's real personality, look at his interactions with the other members of the crossdressing club. Sure he's still a bit arrogant, but he's also caring and supportive. He showers them with compliments, tutors them, helps them be better at crossdressing, negotiates with the school administrators on their behalf, etc. Ryuu likely would have been nice to Ushikawa as well if Ushikawa wasn't so rude to him.

That being said, I do agree Ryuu went too far with the retaliatory mockery, especially given that in this circumstance Ushikawa hadn't actually said anything mean yet; he just looked kind of shell-shocked by the witch cosplay. I disagree his apology was insincere though. I think he just wanted Ushikawa to apologize too, since even if Ryuu teased Ushikawa too much, Ushikawa completely overreacted. But Ushikawa wasn't willing to meet Ryuu half way, despite clearly feeling guilty about what he said (as shown by his stuttering attempts at saying "Ryuu..."). So I'm not surprised that Ryuu got angry.
 
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Honestly I don't get this kind of direction in the story. At this point it just feels like Ryuugasaki and Ushikawa are simply not good for each other, which is weird because they're supposedly the main pairing.
Every other couple in this series has had troubles but they at least have worked or began working through them, yet these two just seem as incompatible as it gets. In fact, judging from this, it almost makes it seem like the solution is for each of them to not be around each other.

I thought for a second this chapter would bring them a step closer to each other for once, but instead they just clashed again. There hasn't been a single point in the story so far, that I can recall, where I see the two as a good fit for each other, and this chapter just strengthens that.

I'm sure down the line they'll reconcile but it just seems weird that, at least until now, their relationship has been so toxic. I find it hard to support them because of it.
 
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I do agree with the comments that these two so not belong together and should stay away from one another. I don't think they're a good pair.

Really both of them are dickheads.
 
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Guys, is it gay to compliment your bros?

But seriously, I can't blame him for not having enough agency in his heterosexuality to admit Ryu is beautiful platonically. Cause he probably isn't. And he's just going to have to get used to that. Maybe think about what the difference is between him calling the other boys cute vs Ryu, cause he's beginning to accept the non-societal conforming aspects of them

Course, Ryu is also not off the hook. He may not have started it, but his excessive teasing definitely didn't help. Let's put this in a hetero situation. If a girl were always teasing a guy into trying to get him to say he likes her or that she's cute, then it becomes a game. Both players need to actually be okay with this or else it is just harassment. This is why it worked for the Asterism couple, cause they implicitly agreed to play. They already admitted to themselves that they had some emotions for the other. The "main couple" on the other hand are not at that point in their relationship to do that, so MC is desperate not to lose the game cause pride and no homo and whatever. He just went from "gay and crossdressing = bad" to mildly accepting it, so he really needs some time to fully grasp what's going on
 
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I completly agree with the comments about the main pair being too toxic for each other, right now the only solution i see is them ending alone or apart. Both are shitty people that can't understand each other.
 
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MC is only considering being gay due to peer pressure and the lack of females the author introduced to the MC.
 
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Fucking. Finally. Ryu finally felt a dent in his stupid egotism. It's true that if Ushikawa had zero feelings or genuinely disliked Ryuu then he wouldn't have kept hanging around him, so Ushikawa is at fault here for the setup. But literally since chapter 1 Ryu has had an ego the size of the moon and loves to toy with him for his own amusement. So far he's just gone along with it, but it's so satisfying to finally see him stand up for himself and try to knock Ryuu off his high horse. If Ryuu genuinely wanted no relationship wish Ushikawa he'd bring it up seriously instead of saying his attraction is "a pain". I hope the boy doesn't cave after this and sticks to his guns so Ryuu can know what it feels like to not be perfect.

@mirewitch If he really did just want Ushikawa to apologise he wouldn't have gone on to insult him for daring to slight his ego. He demanded that Ushikawa 'rephrase' his outburst in a way that he approves of. Does that sound like 'just wanting an apology'? Ryuu created his bigotry by being a bully and an egotist and yet is blaming him for having it. When they reunited at school Ushikawa tried to ignore him but Ryuu kept following him around to tease. It's pretty clear Ryuu wants Ushikawa's approval but he's too stubborn to actually admit it and always achieves it in a roundabout way, often by just narrating out loud what he believes. Heck, he may even be just as bigoted about same-sex relationships as Ushikawa (so long as they involve himself), considering how he laughs at and makes fun of him for his affection. Just because Ryuu is nice to some people doesn't excuse his harassment of others. "Sure he bullied that one kid into crying but look how nice he is to his friends!"
 

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