My First Love Was a Beautiful "Girl" - Vol. 3 Ch. 13

[mirewitch]

@Qyubey

If he really did just want Ushikawa to apologise he wouldn't have gone on to insult him for daring to slight his ego. He demanded that Ushikawa 'rephrase' his outburst in a way that he approves of. Does that sound like 'just wanting an apology'?

Ryuu literally shouted "Apologize" over and over at the end of the argument, so yes I think his goal was an apology. And wanting someone to rephrase or retract their rude statement is pretty standard for an apology about that statement. He wants Ushikawa to focus on his own feelings for Ryuu, and remove the unnecessary personal insults about Ryuu's looks. That's completely reasonable in my opinion, especially since unlike Ushikawa, Ryuu already apologized for the rude thing he did.

Ryuu created his bigotry by being a bully and an egotist and yet is blaming him for having it.

Not really... As I said in my last comment, Ryuu's initial dialogue after seeing Ushikawa was very positive and not self centered. In contrast Ushikawa's first line was to menacingly loom over Ryuu and ask "Why the hell are you still dressed like that?" Like they literally use the ゴゴゴゴ onomatopoeia for menacing. Personally if a guy did that to me I'd be terrified for my safety. Instead Ryuu downplays Ushikawa's wildly inappropriate pseudo-threat by just making a comment about how good he looks. That's a lot more polite a response then Ushikawa deserved honestly.

When they reunited at school Ushikawa tried to ignore him but Ryuu kept following him around to tease.

As I said from their first interaction Ushikawa was overtly hostile while Ryuu was not. As for subsequent interactions - they're roommates. I don't think either of them could ignore the other even if they wanted to. Granted Ryuu could have negotiated with the school admins to change rooms, but so could Ushikawa, and neither of them do that.

Heck, he may even be just as bigoted about same-sex relationships as Ushikawa (so long as they involve himself), considering how he laughs at and makes fun of him for his affection.

He laughs at Ushikawa's affection because Ushikawa's so hostile about it, not because he's got a problem with being gay. If Ushikawa treated him like a normal person from the start, he'd have likely given a more normal rejection (or accepted, who knows).

To be clear I'm not saying Ryuu is perfect. Even putting aside his mockery of Ushikawa's bigotry, he is still somewhat arrogant. Also I think he could have done more to de-escalate the tension with Ushikawa in recent chapters, now that Ushikawa is less overtly hostile. But ultimately I think the person who calls their past friend "a damn crossdresser" is far more at fault than the person who responds by mocking them.

 

[svolozhanin7]

Who, who wait, Whhat day ya mean Pub.Status: Completed?! 😱

 

[Qyubey]

@mirewitch
1. If Ryuu didn't make it an ego thing (his lecture after the shouting), it was clear Ushikawa was going to apologise. He kept trying to start but Ryuu spoke over him. He only refused after it was clear Ushikawa wanted him to repair his ego too by saying he was beautiful. True, he could have just swallowed his pride and done it anyway, but he's pretty clearly sick of playing to Ryuu's tune with no progress to show. I see them both as being too stubborn to put their egos aside.

2. Yeah that's true but recall the last time he saw Ryuu, his crossdressing gave the guy trauma for literal years. True that was Ushikawa's fault but it's understandable that if he sees Ryuu again and he's still crossdressing, he'd assume Ryuu was up to no good - trying to inflict 'the same pain' again. It's a dumb conclusion but it makes sense for him. After he found out why Ryuu was still crossdressing he tried to ignore him and only got stuck when he found out they were roommates.

3. Same as above, he was hostile because he thought Ryuu was doing something sinister by crossdressing. He didn't know they were roommates til later and by now it's clear his issues are more about disliking Ryuu's personality, being repressed, and not wanting to keep being trodden on emotionally. As for not changing rooms, I still see them as both being stubborn (and likely not actually disliking each other at the core, just not wanting to 'lose').

4. Yeah that one was a stretch.

I'd say more than 'somewhat' after reading the early chapters again. He's downright narcissus, even from a kid. I think that's what personally annoys me so I'm happy to see him not get his way, at least for once. I want them to make up and let go of the denial, but still keep some sassy fire, but that can't happen if Ushikawa just keeps getting dunked on. Boy needs a bit of a win so he can afford to let go of his stubbornness. After that I can easily see Ryuu softening up as well.

 

[mirewitch]

@Qyubey
1. I think the reason Ryuu was so pissed about being called ugly is less about ego and more about effort. Ryuu's primary hobby is crossdressing, and he clearly puts a lot amount of time and effort into it being as good as possible. So his friend calling him ugly is going to hurt way more than it would for most people. Its like if you had a friend who was really into singing. They practice all the time, talk about it constantly, and are in a band. If you then told them they had a shit voice they'd be really hurt. Especially if it was obvious you didn't actually believe it, since it would seem like you're saying it just to hurt them. Likewise, Ushikawa could have just shouted that he didn't like Ryuu anymore, or that he wanted Ryuu to stop teasing him, or whatever. He didn't need to belittle all the effort Ryuu puts into crossdressing by shit-talking Ryuu's appearance. Ryuu's outrage isn't about ego, its about Ushikawa needlessly insulting something Ryuu really cares about.

2 and 3. Personally I find the whole "trauma" thing ridiculous, since all Ryuu did was not explicitly mention he was crossdressing to his friend. He didn't actively lie or hurt him or anything. And the fact that Ushikawa held on to this grudge for a decade is even more ridiculous. As such, I can't empathize with Ushikawa's "trauma made me bigoted" defense. Putting that aside, you keep saying that Ushikawa tried to ignore Ryuu after their initial encounter. I don't think that is the case. Sometimes it is, e.g. when he tried to walk away in chapter 1, but other times Ushikawa actively inserts himself into Ryuu's life. Take chapter 3 for example. Ryuu spends the whole chapter trying to help Ushikawa find some other club to join, but ultimately Ushikawa dismisses those options and instead chooses to join the crossdressing club as manager. As seen on pages 30/31, Ryuu's initial reaction is not happy, and he only caves after the other members advocate for Ushikawa. I realize Ushikawa did this to be friends with Ryuu, but nevertheless he's definitely not just ignoring him.

Regarding whether Ryuu's a narcissus, I admit its subjective. Personally I think that he's a mildly arrogant guy who exaggerates his arrogance around Ushikawa to tease him. I don't think he actually believes he is the greatest femboy to ever walk the earth. But I can understand how other people would see it differently, especially if you find his bravado more irritating than charming. And I agree the current status quo can't be maintained - Ryuu needs to tone down the teasing, and Ushikawa needs to stop losing his temper whenever he's attracted to Ryuu.

 

[mirewitch]

@svolozhanin7 Next chapter is the last chapter. There's also a bonus chapter but its just a side story with Asahi/Yano.

 

[pink_rabbit]

Ryuu's got a point. You can separate attraction and looks. Even though a lot of people don't like Ryuu, I do. He is confident in his looks but wants others to feel beautiful too. Yeah, he should have said he was a boy but it's not like he told MC to have feelings for him. Both are at faults to a certain point.

However, the main enemy is gender norms, lack of understanding, and society telling others that we can't have platonic bonds, can't dress up a certain way, and thinking someone is good looking = attraction (when it's not).

 

[Danglark]

Nice chapter. Even if the story is clearly meant to be Ryuugasaki x Ushikawa I kinda want Ushi to not fall in love again, at least not now.

Yeah, there are some good topics that this manga puts in the table, but the whole "I'm constantly losing against Ryuugasaki and can't do anything about it until I fall in love" just seems... I don't know, not as exciting.
I really like the idea of Ushikawa not being bothered by the drag club and not being embarrassed by it, wish there could be more of that.

Anyways, thanks for the translations and until the next chapter.

 

[Ahodegozaimasuru]

Seeing Ushiwaka working so hard to overcome pure aesthetic attraction does make me want to root for him to get some other girl (or guy) for him to fall in love with but for loving their personality.

Also agree with Ryuugasaki there, Ushiwaka should at the very least be able to admit that he looks pretty without falling for him.

 

[exploFey]

rude af, MC is an asshole, fuck this insecure mfcker, go die

 

[Verex]

Calm down people the problem with MC is that he struggle with the fact that person he fall in love and is still in love (despite
his effort to deny it) is a guy. As a straight man it bugs him a lot and cause him to hide his feelings. Let's just calm down and see how it turns out. Ryuu is bit full of himself but in a funny way still i personally think he should humble a bit, it's one thing to have self confidence and completly other to act as spoiled narcistic bitch.

 

[Morgan_911]

A bullshit conclusion is inevitable.
Katsumi would make the best crossdresser as a gal.

 

[KipTheGamer]

Nice.

 

[Marnsghol]

Trap is inevitable, you can run but you can not hide.

 

[GuyOnATricycle]

My guy fumbled the bag so hard 😭

 

[Volttekka]

Honestly, it's a little unfair that the universe is trying to make him fall in love with the trap again, and then making him out to be the bad guy when he doesn't want to.

 

[jibirbghost]

cmon mate theres 2 more chapters to translate damn i wish ik japanese

 

[Dhonatan]

@jibirbghost onde acho a versão japonesa?

 

[Dhonatan]

Briga de casal esse final