i can tell avogado6 is genuinely trying to a quietly impactful short story here but they genuinely do not have command of the skills necessary to do so at this point in their career. Like, they have the subtly of a monster truck, which is fine when most of your work is the twitter oneshot equivalent of a twilight zone episode, but its significantly less effective when what you're trying to write is a poignant relationship study.
actually i just reread, i completely misread the vibe here its actually just another twilight zone episode but the twist is that neglecting children feels bad, my mistake. my brain was completely off the first time i read this