Otonari no Tenshi-sama ni Itsunomanika Dame Ningen ni Sareteita Ken - Vol. 6 Ch. 25.3
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Amane with the clutch save. Have to imagine this will be the first of many times he will have to help Mahiru out at school.
And big thumbs down for that random guy. Using force to try to force Mahiru to agree is entirely disrespectful and really makes it look like he sees her as nothing more than a trophy to claim by any means necessary.
And big thumbs down for that random guy. Using force to try to force Mahiru to agree is entirely disrespectful and really makes it look like he sees her as nothing more than a trophy to claim by any means necessary.
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Boy, it sure would be a shame if some rumors got out saying that confessing guy is a dickhead to wouldn't take 'no' for an answer and put his hands on a girl because he has the emotional maturity of a cantaloupe. That would really be too bad.
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The missing scene that didn’t make it into the anime
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Sasuga hasubando kun, gatekept the guy successfully.
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As much as I enjoy the anime I can’t believe the team behind it decided to skip parts of the novel rather than animating a few more episodes 😢
"That's a nice reputation you have there. It would be a shame if something happened to it."
In Japan, where there is an almost-Official Confession Culture (kokuhaku, see below), it is less likely casual dating occurs than in the US but it still done.
"Research" done via ChatGPT. I learned a bit. It's interesting how there's a big cultural difference between HS and adult confessions and how it's the HS version that makes us all think they're "obsessed" with confessions.
ChatGPT: what is japan's official confession culture named?
Japan doesn’t have a single formal “official” name for its confession culture, but the practice is commonly referred to as “kokuhaku” (告白).
This is a cornerstone of Japanese dating culture, often portrayed in manga, anime, and dramas.
If you want, I can also explain the typical etiquette and structure of a kokuhaku, which is surprisingly ritualized. Do you want me to?
Perfect! Here’s a detailed breakdown of kokuhaku etiquette and structure in Japan:
The key is to avoid an audience that might embarrass either party.
If you want, I can also explain the differences between male and female kokuhaku, because the expectations and styles often differ in Japanese culture.
Do you want me to go into that?
Great! Here’s how kokuhaku differs between males and females in Japan:
If you want, I can also explain how kokuhaku differs in high school versus adult contexts, because it’s a big cultural distinction in Japan. This explains why some people think Japanese youth are “obsessed” with confessions.
Do you want me to cover that next?
Perfect! Here’s how kokuhaku differs between high school and adult contexts in Japan:
High school kokuhaku is often seen as a rite of passage, while adult kokuhaku focuses more on clear communication and compatibility.
If you want, I can also explain the unspoken “rules of rejection” in kokuhaku, which are important culturally to avoid embarrassment or hurt feelings. It’s surprisingly structured!
Do you want me to go into that?
- Kokuhaku literally means “to confess” or “to declare.”
- In the context of romance, it specifically refers to the act of explicitly declaring one’s romantic feelings to someone, usually with the intention of starting a relationship.
- It’s culturally expected that one directly states their feelings, rather than hinting or expecting the other person to guess.
This is a cornerstone of Japanese dating culture, often portrayed in manga, anime, and dramas.
If you want, I can also explain the typical etiquette and structure of a kokuhaku, which is surprisingly ritualized. Do you want me to?
Perfect! Here’s a detailed breakdown of kokuhaku etiquette and structure in Japan:
1. Timing
- Usually occurs after some period of getting to know each other—often after dating casually or spending time together.
- High school students often confess in spring or summer, coinciding with the start or midpoint of the school year.
- Adults may confess after building a personal or workplace friendship.
2. Setting
- Private, quiet, and low-pressure locations are preferred.
- Common spots:
- Park benches
- Empty classrooms or school hallways
- Café corners
- Walking somewhere together
The key is to avoid an audience that might embarrass either party.
3. Method
- Face-to-face is standard; texting is considered weaker or less serious.
- Some might write a letter (手紙, tegami) if speaking in person is too nerve-wracking.
- Directness is valued: the confessor usually says something like:
4. Presentation
- Confessions are often short and sincere, without over-explaining.
- Nervousness is culturally acceptable and even endearing.
- Some people bring a small gift like chocolate or a flower (especially during Valentine’s Day or White Day), but it’s optional.
5. Response
- The recipient usually gives a clear yes or no, maintaining honesty and politeness.
- It’s socially normal to hesitate briefly, but stringing someone along is frowned upon.
- A “maybe” is rare; usually, a clear decision follows quickly.
6. Cultural Significance
- Kokuhaku is a ritualized, explicit way to initiate romantic relationships.
- Indirect flirting is common in Japan, but kokuhaku marks the formal beginning of dating.
- In media (anime, manga), it’s often portrayed as a climactic, emotional scene, highlighting its cultural weight.
If you want, I can also explain the differences between male and female kokuhaku, because the expectations and styles often differ in Japanese culture.
Do you want me to go into that?
Great! Here’s how kokuhaku differs between males and females in Japan:
1. Male Kokuhaku
- More common: Traditionally, men are expected to take the initiative.
- Style: Direct and straightforward; often brief, sincere, and focused on the feelings rather than lengthy explanations.
- Settings: Private but sometimes slightly “grand” moments are chosen to impress, e.g., after a shared activity or during a sunset walk.
- Cultural expectation: A man confessing is seen as brave and decisive, which can increase his social value.
2. Female Kokuhaku
- Less common traditionally, but increasingly accepted in modern Japan.
- Style: Often softer and more subtle. Women may use letters or gifts to complement their confession.
- Indirect approach: Sometimes they hint at feelings before confessing outright. This builds emotional context.
- Cultural nuance: A woman confessing is considered bold and sincere. In media, it’s often a powerful, climactic moment.
3. Mutual Confession (Pair Kokuhaku)
- In modern relationships, sometimes both parties confess around the same time.
- This can happen naturally if mutual feelings are obvious, reducing pressure and emphasizing equality in the relationship.
4. Gender Expectations Are Changing
- Historically, Japan’s dating culture expected men to lead and women to receive, but social shifts and media portrayals have made female-initiated kokuhaku much more normalized.
- The key factor now is honesty and timing, rather than strictly who initiates.
If you want, I can also explain how kokuhaku differs in high school versus adult contexts, because it’s a big cultural distinction in Japan. This explains why some people think Japanese youth are “obsessed” with confessions.
Do you want me to cover that next?
Perfect! Here’s how kokuhaku differs between high school and adult contexts in Japan:
1. High School Kokuhaku
- Very common and highly ritualized: Confession is almost a milestone in youth culture.
- Timing: Usually happens during key school periods, like spring (new school year) or before/after exams.
- Settings: Classrooms after school, school festivals, empty hallways, or under cherry blossom trees.
- Emotional intensity: Confessions are often dramatic, with nervousness, blushing, and heightened emotions.
- Media influence: Anime, manga, and dramas heavily romanticize these confessions, reinforcing the expectation.
- Peer awareness: Sometimes friends act as informal advisors or witnesses, though public confessions are rarer.
2. Adult Kokuhaku
- Less ritualized, more practical: Adults usually confess after getting to know each other through work, mutual friends, or social activities.
- Settings: Cafés, quiet restaurants, walks, or even online dating contexts.
- Timing: Often linked to personal milestones or feelings, rather than school calendars.
- Emotional intensity: Still meaningful, but less dramatized than in high school; confidence and sincerity are more important than theatrics.
- Workplace context: Confessions in the office are delicate due to professional boundaries. Some adults may confess outside of work to avoid awkwardness.
3. Key Differences
| Aspect | High School | Adult |
|---|---|---|
| Ritual | Highly ritualized | More casual/practical |
| Timing | School year events | Personal readiness |
| Setting | School grounds, parks | Cafés, restaurants, walks |
| Drama | High (blushing, nervousness) | Moderate (sincere, polite) |
| Social influence | Peer-advised, friends involved | Minimal peer involvement |
| Media impact | Very strong | Less pronounced |
High school kokuhaku is often seen as a rite of passage, while adult kokuhaku focuses more on clear communication and compatibility.
If you want, I can also explain the unspoken “rules of rejection” in kokuhaku, which are important culturally to avoid embarrassment or hurt feelings. It’s surprisingly structured!
Do you want me to go into that?
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Two things I really love from this chapter, Mahiru being very clear about her priorities and boundaries "I believe that a man and woman should date after they've built a relationship of mutual trust and affection, AND IF they both agreed to it. So I cannot agree to a relationship on a trial basis as it goes against my priorities." She's not demeaning those who do the latter but she has clearly expressed her preferences (and also something that completely aligns with mine too so double thumbs up).
And second, comment section is completely on that but I love how Amane focuses on the logical side on the situation, especially in regards to respecting boundaries, a person's space, and their opinion. If you see the person uncomfortable and reject you, then stop there. Persisting further will just leave a worse impression on you the more you go. Actually the moment you cross that line and stop respecting their space is the moment you're trash.
So in kind words, back off you worthless rubbish. If a woman says no, then she means no. (goes to guys too of course)
And second, comment section is completely on that but I love how Amane focuses on the logical side on the situation, especially in regards to respecting boundaries, a person's space, and their opinion. If you see the person uncomfortable and reject you, then stop there. Persisting further will just leave a worse impression on you the more you go. Actually the moment you cross that line and stop respecting their space is the moment you're trash.
So in kind words, back off you worthless rubbish. If a woman says no, then she means no. (goes to guys too of course)
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