In terms of what you were going for, I see the vision. You’re commenting on the whole clothing malfunction cliché, pointing out the hypocrisy of how women are ogled at, yet men are ridiculed and laughed at for their bodies when put in the same situation. And credit where credit is due, you had the men get undressed as well, not just the women. I see it being an important stepping stone for Mars’ journey, whatever that might be.
It’s a double-edged sword because you do need to show the trope in order to talk about it. It’s not good storytelling to stand on a soapbox and just preach why it’s bad; you need to show why it’s bad.
In terms of execution, I liked seeing Mars’ inner insecurities about Scarlet being caught like that. I think what would have made the chapter better is if we leaned a bit more into that and had the other girls help Scarlet defeat the monkey. It would have shown Mars that women are people too and there’s way more to them than just their looks.
Mars, as Scarlet, has been stripped, almost SA’d, and now has been stripped again. You’ve hammered it in; now it’s time to have Mars see some development, confront his misogynistic mindset head-on.