Soshiki no Shukuteki to Kekkon Shitara Mecha Amai - Vol. 1 Ch. 4

[ScrapTag]

Poor guy has it rough. Hang in there man! She'll eventually hop in the same bed with you (I hope)

 

[praisejesus]

It's probably something like, "I'll lose my magic powers if I get intimate." Regardless of the reason, it is a really painful read.

 

[Kagimizu]

It's probably something like, "I'll lose my magic powers if I get intimate." Regardless of the reason, it is a really painful read.

As I understand it- and keep in mind this is second hand from prior chapter discussion, so don't take my word for it-

Spoiler: Explanation

The reason for her aversion to sex is actually rather realistic. Turns out she has a brother and when she was younger she accidentally came across his porn stash.

Full of incest porn.

Brother/sister incest porn.

So after that fun little discovery, she's had a trauma regarding sexual intimacy ever since. She knows that her husband wants to be intimate, and for her part she feels bad and likewise wants to be intimate with him, but... trauma gonna trauma.

 

[HaxtonFale]

As I understand it- and keep in mind this is second hand from prior chapter discussion, so don't take my word for it-

Spoiler: Explanation

The reason for her aversion to sex is actually rather realistic. Turns out she has a brother and when she was younger she accidentally came across his porn stash.

Full of incest porn.

Brother/sister incest porn.

So after that fun little discovery, she's had a trauma regarding sexual intimacy ever since. She knows that her husband wants to be intimate, and for her part she feels bad and likewise wants to be intimate with him, but... trauma gonna trauma.

That's a fair bit better than just letting it be as it is... I'm still mildly upset though because so much romcom is all about how sexual = bad and how funny it is to see a man dejected by the fact that his partner doesn't want to be intimate with him.

 

[AkaZePanda]

He was just looking for our MC for another ramen night, right guys?

and probably angrily jealous

 

[rabidporcupine]

So… can’t help but find it a little weird that most of you guys are looking at this situation where, without looking at spoilers, this woman clearly has some sort of psychological aversion to sexual stuff, at least for the moment, and her husband is willing to be supportive and not force the subject, and you’re treating it as if it’s morally wrong…

Like, shit, if someone got attacked by a dog as a kid, would you be pissed at them for being scared of dogs too? Because I’m getting the feeling it’s gonna be something a bit like that. Sure, she’s pretty dense too, but the fact that he cares about her enough to understand and not press the issue is a good thing, not a bad one.

 

[Cpu2069]

I regret reading this...

Now I have to wait a month with this cliffhanger.

 

[HaxtonFale]

So… can’t help but find it a little weird that most of you guys are looking at this situation where, without looking at spoilers, this woman clearly has some sort of psychological aversion to sexual stuff, at least for the moment, and her husband is willing to be supportive and not force the subject, and you’re treating it as if it’s morally wrong…

Like, shit, if someone got attacked by a dog as a kid, would you be pissed at them for being scared of dogs too? Because I’m getting the feeling it’s gonna be something a bit like that. Sure, she’s pretty dense too, but the fact that he cares about her enough to understand and not press the issue is a good thing, not a bad one.

I'm not going to speak for everyone here but IMO there's definitely an issue of framing. Manga definitely has a long history of depicting sexuality between a couple as something strictly masculine and also wrong, so when faced with another story where the man wants to be intimate with his girlfriend/wife/partner but is spurned every time I won't give it the benefit of doubt (especially if the chapter started with him being happy about just going on a date with his wife only to find out that the wife's friend will also be there).

On a more personal note, I've been with someone who ultimately didn't seem all that interested in returning the care and attention I was giving to their feelings on our relationship and it was quite upsetting; this is the other reason I sympathise more with his repeated feelings of disappointment (absent more context from the story itself, since we haven't really seen his perspective in depth).

Edit: having revisited chapter 1 they haven't even talked about it, he's just being one-sidedly rejected without being given a reason. It's really hard to just ignore such lack of communication, when it would all be much more tolerable if he was asked to be more patient or something. Not to mention his company junior that, as a married man, he doesn't respond to her attempts at flirting or something? It just all feels so unnecessarily mean to the guy, and I say that as a lesbian...

 

[Kagimizu]

I'm not going to speak for everyone here but IMO there's definitely an issue of framing. Manga definitely has a long history of depicting sexuality between a couple as something strictly masculine and also wrong, so when faced with another story where the man wants to be intimate with his girlfriend/wife/partner but is spurned every time I won't give it the benefit of doubt (especially if the chapter started with him being happy about just going on a date with his wife only to find out that the wife's friend will also be there).

On a more personal note, I've been with someone who ultimately didn't seem all that interested in returning the care and attention I was giving to their feelings on our relationship and it was quite upsetting; this is the other reason I sympathise more with his repeated feelings of disappointment (absent more context from the story itself, since we haven't really seen his perspective in depth).

Edit: having revisited chapter 1 they haven't even talked about it, he's just being one-sidedly rejected without being given a reason. It's really hard to just ignore such lack of communication, when it would all be much more tolerable if he was asked to be more patient or something. Not to mention his company junior that, as a married man, he doesn't respond to her attempts at flirting or something? It just all feels so unnecessarily mean to the guy, and I say that as a lesbian...

Spoiler: Spoilers

Supposedly in the source material we've already seen some things from her perspective, alluding to her issues as well as her private regrets about rejecting his attempts to be intimate. That they haven't come up yet seems to be a product of the manga. As for why she hasn't communicated it with him... well again; trauma's gonna trauma. Plus, Japan has a whole big thing about familial respect and the expectations of it. Hell, look at the West and how hard it is for people to speak up when they're being abused by family members, whether the victim in question is young or old.

She wasn't assaulted or anything, but the experience did traumatize her and it's doubtlessly incredibly awkward for her to talk about. I mean, "I'm sorry, I'm scared of sex because I found my brother's siscon incest porn as a kid" is not exactly an easy discussion to have. Besides not wanting to bring up shameful family matters, she may also be scared of how the revelation might change how he looks at her. Hell, I've known people convinced that if they talk about their problems they'll be abandoned. Logical? No. But when it comes to trauma and insecurity, when has logic ever been the first thing to come to someone's mind?

Knowing what I know the fact the manga appears to be putting off any foreshadowing, perspective, or communication that would make the whole thing more palatable? That is rather frustrating, I will agree.

 

[HaxtonFale]

Spoiler: Spoilers

Supposedly in the source material we've already seen some things from her perspective, alluding to her issues as well as her private regrets about rejecting his attempts to be intimate. That they haven't come up yet seems to be a product of the manga. As for why she hasn't communicated it with him... well again; trauma's gonna trauma. Plus, Japan has a whole big thing about familial respect and the expectations of it. Hell, look at the West and how hard it is for people to speak up when they're being abused by family members, whether the victim in question is young or old.

She wasn't assaulted or anything, but the experience did traumatize her and it's doubtlessly incredibly awkward for her to talk about. I mean, "I'm sorry, I'm scared of sex because I found my brother's siscon incest porn as a kid" is not exactly an easy discussion to have. Besides not wanting to bring up shameful family matters, she may also be scared of how the revelation might change how he looks at her. Hell, I've known people convinced that if they talk about their problems they'll be abandoned. Logical? No. But when it comes to trauma and insecurity, when has logic ever been the first thing to come to someone's mind?

Knowing what I know the fact the manga appears to be putting off any foreshadowing, perspective, or communication that would make the whole thing more palatable? That is rather frustrating, I will agree.

Thanks for the added perspective of the source material. It makes this manga somehow even worse because it feels meaner than I originally thought in the way it just turns his frustration into comedy...

As for the conversation that could be had, I feel like even relatively simple "sorry, I can't right now" would go a long way to even begin addressing the issue, but I've spent a lot of time actively processing my own trauma (which was likely nowhere as severe as well) so idk

 

[nueee]

Thank you

 

[isnotme]

So… can’t help but find it a little weird that most of you guys are looking at this situation where, without looking at spoilers, this woman clearly has some sort of psychological aversion to sexual stuff, at least for the moment, and her husband is willing to be supportive and not force the subject, and you’re treating it as if it’s morally wrong…

Like, shit, if someone got attacked by a dog as a kid, would you be pissed at them for being scared of dogs too? Because I’m getting the feeling it’s gonna be something a bit like that. Sure, she’s pretty dense too, but the fact that he cares about her enough to understand and not press the issue is a good thing, not a bad one.

i mean most manga treat sex as the worst shxtt ever for some reason sure as a pov reader we can see the bigger picture and have context the mc don't have(we manwha reader don't even have context) in his eyes she been rejecting him at aLL TURNS FOR NO REAson

 

[Kalbiaczek]

It's only the 4th chapter and I'm already tired of character introductions I need progress they've been married for a year already just go on ad do something bruh😭😭

 

[Kalbiaczek]

Spoiler: Question for the future

When do you think we'll get the reveal of her trauma? Do you think the mangaka is intentionally dragging it out for some reason?

Now explain to me everything I don't care about the spoilers WHAT kind of trauma dude say it

 

[Kagimizu]

Now explain to me everything I don't care about the spoilers WHAT kind of trauma dude say it

Spoiler: Spoilers for people who DO care

When she was a kid she happened across her older brother's porn stash. Said porn was mostly brother/sister incest porn.

And that was her very first introduction to sex.

 

[GIN_8_6_]

So we will finally have a ramen chapter

 

[Kalbiaczek]

Spoiler: Spoilers for people who DO care

When she was a kid she happened across her older brother's porn stash. Said porn was mostly brother/sister incest porn.

And that was her very first introduction to sex.

So what exactly happened? Did she do it with a stranger out of curiosity or was she just traumatized by the fact her brother could be looking at her that way I need to know bruh

 

[duagreste]

always adults with teenage problems/plots, just a normal day in mangas.
if she has any trauma, just look for a professional and try to take care of it or at least tell her husband what is happening.

 

[RyanFar1d]

This shit sk peak but barely any chapter 💔 💔 💔 I guess I'll see this manga again in a couple of months/years ✌️

 

[wallsg]

Spoiler: Spoilers

Supposedly in the source material we've already seen some things from her perspective, alluding to her issues as well as her private regrets about rejecting his attempts to be intimate. That they haven't come up yet seems to be a product of the manga. As for why she hasn't communicated it with him... well again; trauma's gonna trauma. Plus, Japan has a whole big thing about familial respect and the expectations of it. Hell, look at the West and how hard it is for people to speak up when they're being abused by family members, whether the victim in question is young or old.

She wasn't assaulted or anything, but the experience did traumatize her and it's doubtlessly incredibly awkward for her to talk about. I mean, "I'm sorry, I'm scared of sex because I found my brother's siscon incest porn as a kid" is not exactly an easy discussion to have. Besides not wanting to bring up shameful family matters, she may also be scared of how the revelation might change how he looks at her. Hell, I've known people convinced that if they talk about their problems they'll be abandoned. Logical? No. But when it comes to trauma and insecurity, when has logic ever been the first thing to come to someone's mind?

Knowing what I know the fact the manga appears to be putting off any foreshadowing, perspective, or communication that would make the whole thing more palatable? That is rather frustrating, I will agree.

It may not be an EASY discussion but it is a NECESSARY discussion. Roushi's mental health is being affected as we've seen in previous chapters.