@BIG-OTAKU there were a fair number of grammar mistakes here and there, but nothing too jarring for someone reading your scanlation.
But, the two that were the most obvious to me were:
Page 47 - you said “most fastest”, the problem with that phrase is we never use the word “most” with a word ending in “est”. That’s because the “est” ending means “most”.
Page 55 - I know it’s one of your credits pages, so it doesn’t effect the story, but you made a similar mistake to the one on page 47. You said “more sooner”, the problem there is if an adjective ends with “er” you shouldn’t use the word “more” with it, because they mean the same thing.
I’m sure the quality of your translations will keep improving over time. Keep up the good work