Tsuihou Suru Gawa no Monogatari - Vol. 3 Ch. 24 - That Person

Dex-chan lover
Joined
Oct 26, 2020
Messages
274
Delete Est from the story and the rest would be quite serviceable and by the books self inserting power fantasy. Est was the thing to separate this story from the norm... but the author couldn´t handle it and it seems it did not have anyone who could tell him


Though this was a LN or a WN... so it does have a market, people that wanted this broken thing to become a manga
Even as a 'omniscient and omnipotent self-insert' story it could have been done better.

For one example, Daru could have opposed Athena's decision (because he knows better as an experience adventurer/self-insert/whatever). He could have gone after Est in secret right after Est got kicked out and explained everything. Daru could have plotted with Est that this was just going to be a learning experience for Athena as a party leader while Daru (still secretly) took the time to train Est on the side as a solo combatant to overcome his weakness. When the author decided to wrap up the story Est would come back as planned and whatever progress Athena made in their time apart would be multiplied by reincluding Est. Not only would Daru be portrayed as the powerful, knowledgeable good guy like the author wants the results of his actions would actually line up with that.
 
Dex-chan lover
Joined
Feb 25, 2023
Messages
141
Who has more character development in this manga:

- the 4 people we have seen for most of the time

- the dude we dedicated a few pages

In one chapter all the character growth got nullified, Athena as soon as mighty lord Daru comes in to the picture she becomes a broken machine that just knows how to say "sorry is my fault"

The other two are good i guess, but still not fighting as a group and needing the great Daru (power fantasies work because we do not hate the OP character, if we hate them, it just gets progressively annoying when everything is beneficial to themm)

Now we know Daru is the guy of the memories so we have to wait until Est ends up apologizing to him because... plot

Hate watching this is fun, but this chapter wasn´t fun at all
 
Group Leader
Joined
Dec 15, 2023
Messages
349
Nah this story just started out super bad and stayed such consistently.

Right now there isn't really a single likeable quality about the main cast and everything they do feels hypocritical, especially Athena and Daru considering how they went about the business with Est, who is the only somewhat understandable character in the story.

So really no matter what they do there isnt really a way to redeem them.

Honestly the Rating will tank further down, since the story is just that abysmal really, it's like the usual isekai where you have one somewhat likeable character (mc) and the super over the top villain, who's unreasonably dickheaded, but in this story there is literally only the villain arch-type in every character.
Right? It's just a bad self insert power fantasy story that was sold as a trope subversion.
 
Joined
Aug 5, 2024
Messages
4
Maybe I read it wrong or missed something but it doesn't seem like there's any romantic development between daru and the other party members. Someone correct me if I'm wrong please.
 
Joined
Aug 5, 2024
Messages
4
Didn't they kick Est so that he would "awaken?" Easy way to fix this story so far: Daru kicked est so that he could "awaken." He recognized that they had a strong bond so he kicked Est to train the others to get to Est's level - then they have better coordination both relationship wise and fighting styles. He leaves and Est rejoins. He did this so that they could do what his former party couldn't. Everyone lives happily ever after
 
Dex-chan lover
Joined
Jun 23, 2023
Messages
83
Maybe I read it wrong or missed something but it doesn't seem like there's any romantic development between daru and the other party members. Someone correct me if I'm wrong please.

You're right, there isn't any "official" romance ending. What ends up happening is that Athena finds the D(aru), decides that they need to move to another city, to be stronger than ever, and gives Est one minute before going back to her party and walk into the sunset.
 
Joined
Aug 5, 2024
Messages
4
t
You're right, there isn't any "official" romance ending. What ends up happening is that Athena finds the D(aru), decides that they need to move to another city, to be stronger than ever, and gives Est one minute before going back to her party and walk into the sunset.
For real? Thats how it ends? I'm dumb founded honestly. Insane someone would write this and have it end like that
 
Dex-chan lover
Joined
Jun 23, 2023
Messages
83
One thing that would actully have improved this story massively, and I'm being completely sincere.

Chapter 1: Est Dies.
Focus on Athena and Daru (non-romance route) about their times with Est, having survivor's guilt. Maybe have Miralia have a chapter on her own thoughts.

Side story: Est's thoughts and final day alive.

Story (whatever chapter where it finishes) ends: They thank Est for his sacrifice, but decide to leave to move on and be stronger than ever, walking into the sunset.
 
Joined
Aug 5, 2024
Messages
4
It basically got axed at that point.

I'll give the author the benefit of the doubt then. Couldn't write well enough to drop hints or something that it eventually would end up with a good ending and was forced to end it there. I'll just chalk it up to bad writing. Refuse to believe someone would write a story that ends that way.
 
Double-page supporter
Joined
Jun 20, 2023
Messages
80
It's not that we don't know anything, we already know Author is blowing his horn making him practically invincible and be loved by any female being that exists in this story 🫡

You're giving this story too much credit honestly
I'm not actually expecting anything from this, but what we do know is that he lost at least once. Big time.
 
Joined
Nov 13, 2023
Messages
6
He’s him! Probably not intentional, but meme culture finds a way lol. Damn, i wish these chapters were longer, but oh well. Its been solid so far
 
Dex-chan lover
Joined
Aug 16, 2023
Messages
105
Didn't they kick Est so that he would "awaken?" Easy way to fix this story so far: Daru kicked est so that he could "awaken." He recognized that they had a strong bond so he kicked Est to train the others to get to Est's level - then they have better coordination both relationship wise and fighting styles. He leaves and Est rejoins. He did this so that they could do what his former party couldn't. Everyone lives happily ever after
They kicked him out because they wanted him because they didn't want him to die because he's their "precious friend/ childhood friend". I get your confusion because they didn't behave like friends even once. Even when the reason for his banishment (his possible death) vanished and they found out that he is solo diving dungeons (which should be more dangerous than diving with a party) the didn't approach him.

Your ending would have required at least a bit of talent/logical thinking of the author. As all the major flaws remained since the webnovel (many authors use the step from webnovel to lightnovel to improve their story after having received feedback from the readers) I'm sure that the author and the publishers want this story to be hated.
 
Dex-chan lover
Joined
Aug 16, 2023
Messages
105
I'll give the author the benefit of the doubt then. Couldn't write well enough to drop hints or something that it eventually would end up with a good ending and was forced to end it there. I'll just chalk it up to bad writing. Refuse to believe someone would write a story that ends that way.

I don't think that he wanted to end it there but he probably had a worse ending in mind where during new adventures Daru fights against his feelings but eventually gives in to Athena's advances (he's the one she has admired/loved all her life) because she's so much like his dead ex. Meanwhile Frey and Mirialia try to fight for their respective love interest but at the end they are happy for them because they recognized that they are meant to be.
The typical cliche crap.
After witnessing the author's writing I don't give the benefit of doubt.
 
Group Leader
Joined
Dec 15, 2023
Messages
349
It basically got axed at that point.
I heard rumor the novel was canceled because of how hard it was getting lambasted. The feedback was basically the same as the comment section on Dex where the readers were constantly calling out the author for just how terrible his storytelling was.

I don't think that he wanted to end it there but he probably had a worse ending in mind where during new adventures Daru fights against his feelings but eventually gives in to Athena's advances (he's the one she has admired/loved all her life) because she's so much like his dead ex. Meanwhile Frey and Mirialia try to fight for their respective love interest but at the end they are happy for them because they recognized that they are meant to be.
The typical cliche crap.
After witnessing the author's writing I don't give the benefit of doubt.
With how the story is actually a self insert delusion I can totally see how the author would choose that ending. The difference I could see would be that the author would have some perspective from Dale about how he's trying to take the high road and not start a relationship with someone half his age. But since he's such a magnanimous gentleman he accepts her feelings to not hurt her and somehow honor his old love's legacy.

Also there would be an epilogue with the NTR end where Athena shows up in front of Est after years showing off her marriage and baby bump with her stating that Dale showed that her true happiness is motherhood not being the best adventurer in the world.

The story already had the setup for a bad end with Athena realizing just how much she relied on Est while he was in the party and just how weak she was without him. The author could have expanded on that to show regret, acceptance, and growth and when the story is about to come to a close where the two parties are at the pinnacle she reaches out and tries to reconcile he simply says "that time is gone." They both go their separate was heads held high but sadness on their face for thoughts of what might have been.
 
Dex-chan lover
Joined
Aug 16, 2023
Messages
105
If Daru were a normal isekai character, people would love him, but now people are all raging? You're not fooling anyone folks.
Do you have any proof for your claim?

It's astonishing how all the fans of this manga ignore all the criticism mentioned in all the threads and pretend that all the people wanted to hate the story from the beginning.

Did you even read the other comments? Because there is absolutely no content in yours to invalidate any criticism. The story has nothing to do with isekai. Even if Daru was an isekai character he and his party would still be unlikable because of their hypocritical behaviour and all their actions, which make no sense.

But nice try defaming critics with unproven claims (unfortunately these are usual tactics nowadays).
Next time go into detail and try to refute the points of criticism.
And don't come like "I won't because folks will hate the manga either way".

Btw, I already mentioned that there are probably worse stories with better ratings. But the thing is that they didn't pretend to be something else so they attracted people who are into these stories. The author pretended that this manga was a different approach to the usual banished trope but it turned out to be a bad soap opera in a fantasy setting with little content and a lot of unnecessary, illogical drama.
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Top