Afternoon, the golden sun is shining through the windows of a small office.
It was a shift like every other one. I entered our detective agency, the smell of coffee pairing perfect with the dark oaken furniture. On the desk, busy with paper work, sat
@BlackGeneral, who immeadiatly looked up to greet me. "We have a new case", he grinned as he was waving a folder on his right hand, "And from a distinguished person at that." "What do you mean 'distinguished' person?", I asked. In this lawforsaken place fame just meant trouble. "Relax, this one's a-ok. Surely you've heard of
@BakedBanana, the burier of Panda and Co. funeral home. They want us to check on someone, see if they're dead."
"Dead? Isn't this the domain of the
Corpse Bearers? Why come to us?" This all seemed rather strange as someone from Panda and Co. funeral home should be able to pay the price for those carriers. "Maybe they forgot about them, maybe they don't want to raise suspicion, maybe we should just take this easy job and be happy with the generous payment they offer? Now go, take the case, questions don't pay the bills."
And just like that I was shoo'd away and landed outside on the streets. With a heavy sigh I got to work.
Evening, street lamps start to glow, the forums nightlife begins to get in motion. In front of the Posting library.
Even asking random people didn't result in much, not that I was expecting something else. If only Dr.
@TheTopAdventure wasn't on an expedition right now, I could have really used his intellect and deduction skills. But then I arrived at my last resort - the Posting library. Entering it, the buzzing and whiring of thousands of intricate machinery, carriers of the posts, hit my ear drums. Only natural, after all. They are the life blood of the forums communication. Lucky that I asked a friend of a friend to let me in their archives, else I wouldn't have known what else to do. I quickly search the database for the last known postings of
@Mr_Detective.
There it is, 21st January 2025, a comment on a manga chapter. Doesn't lead to much insight. As all postings before do. The only notable fact is that he was hosting a Music Tournament before disappering for good. There - a clue. A ban in the shitpost pub because of political talk, fascinating. While I don't know the duration, it is a lead at least. And I think I know exactly where to head next.
Night, revelry and festivity can be heard around the forum as well as words both kind and hateful. The usual. In the M.U.A. (monitored user activity)
Tired I opened the mainframe of the M.U.A. While a part of it is constantly up and running, us investigators and detectives can only access it at given times. After a playful
melody tells me of the systems startup, I begin my work. Using the database isn't hard. Using the slow OS is atrocious. System hasn't been updated since elf knows when, 'we don't need to right now', 'it works good enough' or 'you are only using it once or twice a year anyway' being to most told excuses since 7 years ago. Oh well, can't do anything about that now. As I click through the screen,
waiting 15 seconds between clicks, I finally find what I am looking for. 15th February 2025, last known sighting of Mr_Detective. Perhaps a quick look before leaving the forums behind in fury or disappointment? The world will never know.
Some hours past midnight, only a lonely, small light shines from the detective agency.
Heh, looks like I am not the only one staying up late tonight. As I enter a familiar grin with dark eye bags beams at me. "It is late. I figure you found what we need?" "Yes. Here, take this." I toss BlackGeneral my folder with all the most important intel on the case. "If you ask me, our person is dead. My condolonces to the Banana. There seems to have been an issue before his departure which most likely contributated to the disappearance." "Does that mean he wont come back?", asked BlackGeneral as he was beginning to sort everything out. "You know how it is in a place like this. Necromancers here and there, users dropping like mayflys and coming back as phoenixes, death as a concept is very vague here. Though BakedBanana should be able to bury him in peace."
"Alright, I will tell him tomorrow. You just go now and sleep a bit." "Heh, sound advice that you too could use." He chuckled as I left the office and headed home.
Just another case for Sherlock Strike
Status Report
Case: closed
Mr_Detective: deceased, probably out of anger/disappointment
