Boy's Abyss - Vol. 5 Ch. 40 - Lamplight

[Tamerlane]

Pretty much the culmination of everything he's endured so far of everyone wanting him to be what they want instead of his own person. It's well setup.


@XNovalX
Nah, I'd say that's incorrect given that the events leading up to this moment pretty much inform his mentality here. He's returned to square one because everyone in his life is basically using him as a means to an end rather than an end in and of himself. It's not that he hasn't had character development or that him returning back to how he was isn't well informed given his experiences and circumstances, but that no matter where he turns to, or what road he travels, he's unable to break free or be himself as everyone has more or less projected what they want onto him and want him to fulfill their fantasies instead of his own

 

[yoofo]

@Tamerlane I don't think it's spelled out clearly enough. Everyone's using him for themselves, but the message of "He's his own person" isn't put through because he just follows along. He doesn't have his own goal, he just wants to get out. But even that isn't told well enough imo.

 

[Sagara-Sousuke]

If I were him I'd fake my death and disappear, start a new life away from all those people. Even becoming homeless is better than this

 

[themoobz]

POOSI DOOMER

 

[Tamerlane]

@yoofo

Well, yeah, he doesn't have his own goals because he doesn't know what his purpose in life is or what to live for anymore when it just seems that everyone is projecting their own wants and desires onto him. It's just a primal desire to get away from it all, sink or swim, but he doesn't know what to do once he's escaped it all or what his ultimate goal is because it's fight or flight.

I think that ambiguity is actually really interesting because it informs why he's so suicidal because he doesn't know what to live for, or what goal he should seek, as he just knows how to follow along rather than to be himself.

 

[Bajanprincess]

This manga has been “fun” but I’m getting off this depression carousel. I’ll drop this here.

 

[Beatrice]

Good chapter. It's not character regression, it's a natural result of Reiji finally taking in all the insanity that's happened to him. Every close person in his life has turned out much differently than he believed them to be. Yet they all have one thing in common: they want to monopolize him for their own ends. He feels no freedom no matter where he goes. Page 14 has to be one of my favorites so far. Now that Esemori is back in the game . . . I can't imagine anything good will come out of it.

If I'm surprised about anything however, it's how much Reiji really wanted to die. I think he might have wanted it more than Nagi herself at this point. On the topic of Nagi, what did Reiji or anybody else expect from her exactly? To be at his beck and call whenever he had problems to air out, then leave her at his convenience just like before? If that one-sided relationship is how Reiji perceives Nagi, then he'd be using her as much as everyone else is using him. The truth hurts but the only tether connecting her to him was the promise of double suicide. She never had an interest beyond that because she never lived for anything. This is not news to the readers or to Reiji, she said it to his face very early on. In the diner, Chako made Nagi promise never to ask Reiji to die with her again. She told Reiji that it was goodbye and they probably would never meet afterwards. None of this was sudden, she was honest from the beginning and did what she said she would. Ultimately, neither Reiji or Nagi were deeply concerned about the other. Reiji suffers alone, and Nagi goes back to the life that made her desire death in the first place. There are no winners here.

 

[Tivoli]

Why are you taking hostage of the latest chapters? Chapter 41 english scans is literally uploaded somewhere already on the internet but you're still here uploading a chapter from 2 weeks ago.

 

[Dundun123]

Boy, forget about Nagi! Like she ever gave a rat's ass about you. A pretty face and a hot bod and that's all that a guy will follow. Even into the "abyss". Yeesh. This is some Siren shit im seeing here, but more psychological. :-/

 

[harou]

@Tivoli Relax my dude, it's scanlation, nobody's taking anything hostage. Our translator has been busy due to him having some exams recently so stuff got delayed, we'll be back on a normal schedule with the next chapter.

 

[bigmonkeyyy]

@Sagara-Sousuke yes but with his mum cause i really pity her

 

[KawaiiMajinken]

@harou You guys should just ignore those kind of messages. You are doing this for free and whatever your reasons are you are free to take as much as you want.

 

[Sem]

Ar this point I'm starting to believe Esemori might be the healthiest character in this whole damn town

 

[Raydnt]

@Tivoli
You're a butthole

 

[Robinisback]

This... THIS IS TRUE ROMANCE.

 

[Rangetrout]

@Tivoli

Mate where can i read those? hook a brother up

 

[Yourself]

 

[Itsn]

I can't tell if this is romanticizing suicide or not.

 

[MrSometimer]

@Sem you're right

 

[godofcleric]

@Itsn it probably was, now it's not with this chapter. It shows his 'act' of suicide is triggered. I think it will go downhill from here.