People complaining about the enforcing of "useless" rules. It is those very useless rules that make society in the first place. It is the useless rule to greet each other in case of meeting. You are not forced to do so, but we all do it, because it is a showoff that you are accepting the rules of a conversation and aren't hostile (unless you have hidden ulterior motive). Hence the other person is shown the willingness to share time, and therefore resource with you, that benefit both in some way or another.
Now on the specific rules here "Isn't that exactly what's preparing them for society?". It totally is. Those girls and later woman, will marry a person who will provide for them and their offspring, and in return they only need to "behave" in a way that isn't disturbing the social status of the partner. There is no problem with that. Those future wife will get spoiled with the earings their ("rich") men do, and for that exchange they have to confirm into their role. This role has restrictions and is confined by rules. IF you don't accept rules in your early life you show that you don't be willing to go along them in a later part. And if you don't do so you are in the least part an annoyance to your future partner and in the worst no proper partner to have offspring with.
Fucking spoiled people think of rules as something to break for their own amusement, or those very rules are just "dumb". But you can only say so, if you have the means to make yourself a living to live outside of the rules. And it is only a couple decades ago, that woman can (without prostituting themself in one way or another) live "independent". Non or less they still are not, because most of them who might be looking independent only substituted the husband by the welfare state and are still in some kind of wealth transfer especially if they wanna have offspring and raise it properly (e.g. form them to their own ideals and not them of others, like surrogates or in the worst case the state, which only has the interest to form a proper tax-payer). Woman are over their lifetime netto negativ tax payers on the average and this will never change as long as they actually want to be in charge of having and raising offspring along the lines of maternal instinct.
So the trade society offered at least for the most part in mankind history was the dependence to a husband who can provide full time and exchange the confirmation to a set of rules to be the wife that is needed to have and raise offspring that will by themself do the same in the moment of having the best living conditions possible in that situation.
Don't give yourself the crap of independence. You never will be as long as you wanna have all the benefits of society and that also lasting for future generations to come. It would be better to not look down on this. Sure it has its problems, but it was stable for the purpose of perpetual procreation, which is the purpose of life. If the collective or individual stray away to much from it. Well. If you brake it you won't fix it. And that is happening in the west right now. YOU get replaced.
The theme of rules and following it or breaking them is a thing to debate over all history long, having it in this context is rather strange, but also I guess an intent of the setting and actions of the protagonists.