Downer Onee-san wa Asobitai - Vol. 1 Ch. 1

[LuxLunar]

Glad someone finally picked this up. I've been debating with myself for months about picking it up, so I'm glad I don't have to.
If you're okay with notes I noticed a few minor errors in my read, like

Spoiler: annoying tl notes that you might not care about

on page 6, that bit about the switch being flipped is him talking about her, not about himself so it'd be her instead of me. And in the panel before that, she doesn't call him useless but is saying something like "that's no good, kid/boy."
On page 7 and on page 16, the lines about showing/being shown the unseen (みえないものをみせてやろう）are a reference to the current beyblade show, beyblade X where that's a major catchphrase/tagline of the show (I'll show you something you can't (normally) see/I'll show you the unseeable/etc), (though the official translation of the tagline is "something Xtraordinary" apparently if you care.) So it might be good to keep that reference in tact, since this whole manga is about references to other corocoro manga.
Then on page 10, I'm pretty sure the joke was that she offered up 3 hells-scythes and 3 hells-chain (though different colored sku's) which is why he said they're all the same. Not sure why that was changed so drastically in your tl.
On page 11 in the last panel, you start with the japanese catchphrase of GO SHOOT but then in the next page you go with the english of LET IT RIP, so you should probably change the "go-" to "let-".
On the page 16 in the bottom middle panel, in regards to the chime, the original references "good kids" rather that just kids, which is later joked on in a later chapter where

Spoiler

she runs off calling herself a good kid

so if you care about consistency, it might be a good idea to change the wording to keep the "good kid" part.
On the next page (17), she says "bye-bee/バイビー" which is (old) slang so it seems a bit weird to translate it as her stuttering seeya.
Oh also, I could be wrong but I'm pretty sure she consistently calls him "shonen" which is like kid or boy, every time, so might be good to standardize which you use rather than switching it (buddy, kiddo, boy, removing it like in page 5, etc.)

But you can just ignore me and do your own thing if that's what you'd prefer. Good luck with the rest!

Spoiler: Spoiler

P.6I noticed that there was something wrong there, but the translator was so sure that I thought I was going crazy... I only left it because his change of tone made it work in theory. That was an adaptation I made (I thought it would match the tone at the time)//P.7 As I said before, I probably wouldn't understand most of the references to beyblade, but the rest of Corocoro I have no worries about (unlike the team that is locating the Vanguard cards).//P.10 All beys look the same for me... Minus Basalt Horogium Twist (I miss Metal Saga). The dramatic change I'll fix soon the reason is because I was dumb and used the final ending to try to locate these beys (I really thought for a moment that the joke was that all beys really look alike)//P.11 I wrote that as a reference to the anime since I knew I was going to miss out on a lot of beyblade references.//P.16 4got about it!//P.17 True... it was MTL's recommendation to translate it like this and as I'm not 100% fluent in English I thought it was some kind of cheesy way of saying bye bye// The shonen thing I changed it because I thought it would be better to have more variety depending on the moment.(

Thanks for the recommendation! Some divergences occurred due to the way the Brazilian translation standard differs from the English one.

 

[LuxLunar]

Your MTL sucks; translating “onee-san” as “young lady” is ridiculous and obviously wrong. It literally means “older sister” and is used to refer to females older than you! “young lady” is for females younger than you (or rich pampered ones)! Come on!

That wasn't MTL, it was a fully lucid choice on my part🐱

I admit that Young Lady might have been a bit weird, but ultimately I thought it was acceptable for the moment... In any case, leaving it at onee-san or translating it into older sister was ruled out at first.

 

[LuxLunar]

Problem is I'm not good at TSing and you're decent. I would pick up the manga and continue doing my scan but I'm worried about my TS so honestly even if it's just TS I would REALLY like your help for this.

I'm gonna think about it! At the moment I have to focus a little more on Kaneda-san and Black Channel...

 

[hiu12ike]

I'm gonna think about it! At the moment I have to focus a little more on Kaneda-san and Black Channel...

Alright. In the meantime imma do a ch 2 script and then continue to work on my very slow ch 1 TS. If you want to work together I'm active on discord with the same username.

 

[LuxLunar]

Thanks for all the Feedback!

Version 2.0 is on now!

 

[kurobaraito]

Finally the OL Agnes Tachyon manga is here!

 

[Kuroshirou87]

i thought am i the only one imagine that

Finally the OL Agnes Tachyon manga is here!

 

[ariff]

Finally the OL Agnes Tachyon manga is here!

definitely agnes tachyon

 

[Dead4rain]

I need her.

 

[Kaidoscope]

BEYYYBLADEEEEE HOLY SHIT THERES ALSO VANGUARD?! OH MY GOD AHHHHHH

 

[Kaidoscope]

now this is peam

 

[Sakuyadorf]

My type of pervert