I was about to comment on the salon/saloon thing, but I see pajamawolfie has already addressed that.
It is a very common mixup in my country, Malaysia.
I've taken a look at the raw for this chapter, and I don't think "じゃあその髪早く捨てて?" should be translated as "Well then, can you hurry up and throw away my clump?"
I would translate it as "So then, could you hurry up and get rid of that hair?" since that's what it literally means.
Also, I looked into the scene before this, and I think the translations aren't following what was said quite as closely.
"どっちみち毛先は美容院で整えてもらうから", translated as "I can always go to a saloon to get any mistakes fixed." actually means "I'll be getting the tips of my hair done at the beauty salon anyway"
"過ちは゛死゛だ…", translated as "any mistakes are punishable only by "death"", actually means "failure means "death"..."
The title of this chapter, "Interlude 瑛乃の来訪", is not "A Fly in the Ointment". It is supposed to be "Interlude: Eno's Visit".
"A Fly in the Ointment" is the translation for the segment header, "玉に瑕", which is for the page in which Eno shows her concern for Tatsu but sticks her head in between Kotoka's legs at the end of the page. "玉に瑕" literally means "flaw in the jewel", and the meaning this Japanese idiom is expressed in the English idiom "fly in the ointment".
The next segment header, "顔に出るのは素直故かバカ故か", which is for the page directly following the previous page, should be translated as well, but somehow the unnecessary explanation for "pot calling the kettle black" replaces it. The segment header means "Not sure if what's shown on her face is because of honesty or stupidity"
Kotoka's line, "絵面が変態すぎて全く感動できない…", which was translated as "That story's ending was so stupid that I couldn't feel anything...", is not entirely wrong, but rather than the story's ending, the description is for the story itself, and unfortunately it was the subtext that was translated rather than the main text; this is most likely intentionally done by the author: the furigana for "変態" is normally "へんたい", but in the raw, "バカ" was given. "変態" = "hentai" = "perverted" but in this case, the author wants to show "変態" and "バカ" at the same time. Thus, if I were to translate this line, I'd say, "The story is too perverted (stupid) that I can't feel anything..."
I didn't go through every single line to check for inaccuracies in translation; these are just the ones that caught my eye as I glossed over the raw.
I used to be a translator more than 10 years ago, and I would be more than happy to translate manga chapters, but now I'm too busy with work to do translations.