I've run into a lot of people like this, for non trans people, I call this person the "No labels en-labeller". They come off as some enlightened buddha and you let your guard down and then they drop shitty things on you and say "boyfriend is just a word don't get so worked up".
Those people are privileged shits who never had a difficulty in their lives and if they ever did they would never adopt such a philosophy, Imagine some one saying "Marcus is my black friend" completely devoid of awareness of the repercussions or effect on their friend. People like this try to create circle of diverse friends that they find interesting but treat them more like exhibits then showing empathy and understanding.