if this girl makes you irrationally angry you have issues.
everything mc is and has done is his own fault. she's a bitch, ok, the world is full of them. get over it. ignore her or fix her. she's retarded, you can't sit and cry and throw your life away because a retard was mean to you.
getting with her would be a way better development than the imaginary sex doll, that's actual character growth, learning to dominate and correct what you're scared of.