Kono Koi wo Hoshi ni wa Negawanai - Vol. 4 Ch. 20 - Prologue

[Feyrwen]

AHHH I NEED A NEW CHAPTER RIGHT AT THIS INSTANCE

Whenever Kyowli wakes up and jumps on discord, we are immediately updated with the current countdown for a new chapter.

This wait is exceptionally long and I just want more.

 

[Gustbk]

Started reading and caught up in a day. Very fun story…although the implications of calling this chapter the prologue is fascinating…

Does that mean it’s the prologue of their romance? Of the story in general? Of the story about their marriage?

They both love each other the most but Eri does need to figure out just how much of it has grown to be romantic feelings as well, it’s certainly not “I don’t mean it that way”

 

[Azalel]

i agree that Eri can't blame herself for not being considerate of feelings she wasn't even aware about that much is 100% Fuyu's fault, HOWEVER Eri's blame lies at the fact that she uses everyone in her life as crutches, she used her boyfriends and previous flings as sexual and romantic crutches because she had fuyu as her one true emotial crutch, she used her and treated her as a lover in every aspect except when it came to her comitment to that relationship, whishing that they were eachothers number one but as long as she could fuck around since in her pov sex and kisses don't matter as much as a childhood relationship, Fuyu shoud've brought this up way earlier since the full weight of this toxic ass relationship is laying on her, but even if Eri wasn't aware of her romantic feelings, this dynamic was still so uneven

I very much agree with that and hope that senpai will also mention how uneven her relationships were and how flawed her understanding of romantic relationship is after hearing about them from Fuyu and it hits her.

 

[EchoGirl]

Srs stuff aside , I love how the author felt a need to make a note saying don’t point fries at ppl (altho I know pointing in general is usually considered rude )

 

[Ziya_Agafya]

I hope Fuyuki is with her senpai at the end...

 

[zurichtime]

I am still in camp Fuyuki x Senpai, even when the author decides Fuyuki x Eri end game.

My heart has been hurt so much from reading Fuyuki's suffering that I wish the author will make Fuyuki to move on from Eri. Oh god.. I can only wish

 

[ImNot_Real]

Senpai always looking fine as ever!

 

[suxh1]

Thank you soo much isa ceire nyan and albo!! I can finally read this after a while

 

[what.]

I need Senpai to keep Fuyuki. SENPAI DESERVES HAPPINESS TOO

 

[mimuro]

As much as I want them to fix their problem I still couldn't support Eri for what she's done, and I just can't buy her excuse for not knowing Fuyuki's feeling and go fuck around with other people's feeling and relationship

 

[CynicalPepper]

Why have I been seeing a trend lately of people blaming people for not confessing to another person, that's very dumb. I agree, by technicality, Eri isn't at fault, but blaming someone for not saying something is fucking stupid no matter what, saying that something like that is someone's fault dismisses how difficult doing something like that would be especially in a mainly conservative country.

Eri does still in fact though have faults that exacerbated the situation further than it should have. It isn't Eri's fault for not knowing or doing what she did, but it's undeniable that her general attitude regarding people and life caused these problems to begin with.

The only thing that still confuses me though is, why did she even go out with what was her boyfriend anyway when she didn't even like him? I'm unsure if this was explained or...?

 

[Ohin]

The only thing that still confuses me though is, why did she even go out with what was her boyfriend anyway when she didn't even like him? I'm unsure if this was explained or...?

I think there's a lot of factors at play here. The most general reasons are things like the general societal expectation to have a normal heterosexual relationship (comp het) and that rejecting someone is genuinely difficult if you don't really have a good reason, it was probably easier for Eri to just let those relationships die on their own and lean on Fuyuki for her emotional support. With Kyou specifically that rejection is probably harder because of their long standing relationship, and also he promised not to get in the way of her relationship with Fuyuki (which is what caused her issues with her previous relationships).

Eri's emotional intelligence is pretty much abysmal, so I honestly think the main reason she keeps getting into doomed relationships is because she doesn't really know better (in terms of what she wants and what others want from her) and just wants to make her life simpler by conforming to what is expected.

 

[raineight]

Story would be so much simpler if someone told Eri "Fuyuki's the most important person to you? Well, you to her too, and she wants to bone you, and you don't mind doing that with your partners, so have at it."

 

[gimme_yuri_plz]

Eri can't be blamed for not knowing how Fuyuki feels. But what about not letting Fuyuki date or letting other people touch her? What about kissing Fuyuki while she's in a relationship, knowing that she likes girls, and then claiming that you don't have romantic feelings for her?

 

[bluebutterfly15]

Eri can't be blamed for not knowing how Fuyuki feels. But what about not letting Fuyuki date or letting other people touch her? What about kissing Fuyuki while she's in a relationship, knowing that she likes girls, and then claiming that you don't have romantic feelings for her?

First of all, let’s address the kiss. Eri was emotionally vulnerable and hysterical at the time, and acted on impulse. It was bad, she knew almost immediately that it was a mistake, and she apologised at the first available opportunity. Of course, we also have to acknowledge that her perception of why it was bad is different from the reasons why it hurt Fuyuki. That’s why her sincere apology ended up making things worse, because she didn’t know and couldn’t have known the whole situation.

As for Eri’s so called “possessiveness”, I think this is people misunderstanding what it means when Eri says that Fuyuki is a her number 1 priority and vice versa. Eri has dated plenty of guys before, but she has always prioritised Fuyuki. That’s not just wanting Fuyuki, her most important person, around on special occasions like her birthday, or asking her for help when she needs it, she also wants to do the same for Fuyuki. If Fuyuki asked, Eri would have dropped any of her boyfriends at the drop of a hat to go to Fuyuki’s side. She’d probably give up dating altogether if Fuyuki ever expressed having a problem with it. And when Fuyuki said she got a “girlfriend”, she claimed at the time nothing would change about their relationship.

Unfortunately, Fuyuki was reaching her limit and used Kyou and Kisaki as excuses to distance herself from Eri, which made the latter naturally anxious at the seemingly sudden change of behaviour. From her perspective, it looked like Kisaki was monopolising Fuyuki‘s time to steal her away from Eri, something she’d never purposefully let any of her boyfriends do. She got mad at Kyou when he claimed to be the reason why Fuyuki chose not to be there for Eri’s birthday. And in Eri’s defence, Kisaki also played up the part of the possessive girlfriend for the sole purpose of provoking a reaction and follow-up introspection from Eri.

As for the drunk Fuyuki incident, like I said, part of prioritising Fuyuki means being the one who is always there for her when she’s the one who needs help. That‘s how they were when they were younger, though it’s happened less since they grew up as Fuyuki has gone out of her way not to show her vulnerable side to Eri. Now consider from Eri’s perspective, Fuyuki is in an incrediblely vulnerable state that she isn’t even aware of her surroundings and can’t speak for herself (which is why Kisaki could get away with what she did), she’s Eri’s most important person and vice-versa, it makes perfect sense to her she’d be the one to look after Fuyuki. Then Kisaki played the girlfriend card, in public no less. Leaving her with anyone in a lesser relationship feels like forfeiting something precious, and also like a betrayal of Fuyuki’s feelings, and yet, she knows her perspective isn’t supported by the majority.

Even a lot of commenters can’t fully relate to Eri’s perspective and pass it off as simply just possessiveness and from an outside perspective that is how it appears, however really it’s because of how much she cherishes Fuyuki that she doesn’t feel she can entrust her to anyone else if it can be helped. If she were a family member or significant other, most people would side with her. Heck, some people even expect SOs to act “possessive“, otherwise it‘s like they don‘t care about their partner as much as they should. And again, as has been stated repeatedly, because all of Eri’s experiences with romance have been lukewarm at best, she doesn’t have a high opinion of those relationships when comparing it to the one she’s shared with Fuyuki, a perspective that isn’t uncommon for someone on the ace/aro spectrum (I suspect she‘s demiromatic, possibly demisexual). It’s Eri’s rather uncommon mindset that makes it difficult for a lot of people to understand her actions and intent, viewing her actions only from the perspective of an outside observer.

If I’m honest with myself, it is quite fascinating to observe from the comments. I wonder how much of it is a lack of media literacy, and how much of it is an inability or unwillingness to understand a perspective so far removed from one’s own. I’m very socially awkward, and struggle to connect with other people, so being able to get inside a character’s head, to understand their motives and actions is perhaps something I’m more inclined to do.

 

[gimme_yuri_plz]

First of all, let’s address the kiss. Eri was emotionally vulnerable and hysterical at the time, and acted on impulse. It was bad, she knew almost immediately that it was a mistake, and she apologised at the first available opportunity. Of course, we also have to acknowledge that her perception of why it was bad is different from the reasons why it hurt Fuyuki. That’s why her sincere apology ended up making things worse, because she didn’t know and couldn’t have known the whole situation.

As for Eri’s so called “possessiveness”, I think this is people misunderstanding what it means when Eri says that Fuyuki is a her number 1 priority and vice versa. Eri has dated plenty of guys before, but she has always prioritised Fuyuki. That’s not just wanting Fuyuki, her most important person, around on special occasions like her birthday, or asking her for help when she needs it, she also wants to do the same for Fuyuki. If Fuyuki asked, Eri would have dropped any of her boyfriends at the drop of a hat to go to Fuyuki’s side. She’d probably give up dating altogether if Fuyuki ever expressed having a problem with it. And when Fuyuki said she got a “girlfriend”, she claimed at the time nothing would change about their relationship.

Unfortunately, Fuyuki was reaching her limit and used Kyou and Kisaki as excuses to distance herself from Eri, which made the latter naturally anxious at the seemingly sudden change of behaviour. From her perspective, it looked like Kisaki was monopolising Fuyuki‘s time to steal her away from Eri, something she’d never purposefully let any of her boyfriends do. She got mad at Kyou when he claimed to be the reason why Fuyuki chose not to be there for Eri’s birthday. And in Eri’s defence, Kisaki also played up the part of the possessive girlfriend for the sole purpose of provoking a reaction and follow-up introspection from Eri.

As for the drunk Fuyuki incident, like I said, part of prioritising Fuyuki means being the one who is always there for her when she’s the one who needs help. That‘s how they were when they were younger, though it’s happened less since they grew up as Fuyuki has gone out of her way not to show her vulnerable side to Eri. Now consider from Eri’s perspective, Fuyuki is in an incrediblely vulnerable state that she isn’t even aware of her surroundings and can’t speak for herself (which is why Kisaki could get away with what she did), she’s Eri’s most important person and vice-versa, it makes perfect sense to her she’d be the one to look after Fuyuki. Then Kisaki played the girlfriend card, in public no less. Leaving her with anyone in a lesser relationship feels like forfeiting something precious, and also like a betrayal of Fuyuki’s feelings, and yet, she knows her perspective isn’t supported by the majority.

Even a lot of commenters can’t fully relate to Eri’s perspective and pass it off as simply just possessiveness and from an outside perspective that is how it appears, however really it’s because of how much she cherishes Fuyuki that she doesn’t feel she can entrust her to anyone else if it can be helped. If she were a family member or significant other, most people would side with her. Heck, some people even expect SOs to act “possessive“, otherwise it‘s like they don‘t care about their partner as much as they should. And again, as has been stated repeatedly, because all of Eri’s experiences with romance have been lukewarm at best, she doesn’t have a high opinion of those relationships when comparing it to the one she’s shared with Fuyuki, a perspective that isn’t uncommon for someone on the ace/aro spectrum (I suspect she‘s demiromatic, possibly demisexual). It’s Eri’s rather uncommon mindset that makes it difficult for a lot of people to understand her actions and intent, viewing her actions only from the perspective of an outside observer.

If I’m honest with myself, it is quite fascinating to observe from the comments. I wonder how much of it is a lack of media literacy, and how much of it is an inability or unwillingness to understand a perspective so far removed from one’s own. I’m very socially awkward, and struggle to connect with other people, so being able to get inside a character’s head, to understand their motives and actions is perhaps something I’m more inclined to do.

Wow, that's a lot of text! In short, I think you're trying to justify Eri's toxic behavior by saying she cherishes Fuyuki. Love can be toxic in the worst way, so even if she treats him like number one, that doesn't make it okay. As shown, she can be very sick and have double standards.

As for your last comment, does that mean that someone who disagrees with you has a "lack of media literacy"? Really? Maybe you're riding a high horse.

I might not agree with you, but I won't be disrespectful or accuse you of lacking literacy.

 

[bluebutterfly15]

Wow, that's a lot of text! In short, I think you're trying to justify Eri's toxic behavior by saying she cherishes Fuyuki. Love can be toxic in the worst way, so even if she treats him like number one, that doesn't make it okay. As shown, she can be very sick and have double standards.

As for your last comment, does that mean that someone who disagrees with you has a "lack of media literacy"? Really? Maybe you're riding a high horse.

I might not agree with you, but I won't be disrespectful or accuse you of lacking literacy.

I never accused you or anyone specifically of media illiteracy, I was just speculating on where all this Eri hate is coming from when she has never done anything explicitly wrong or “toxic”.

What did she do that was actually wrong? Wanting Fuyuki to be there for her birthday and getting upset over it? That’s a perfectly valid and not uncommon reason to get upset with someone, especially with such a flimsy excuse. Insisting on being the one to look after Fuyuki? Again, not an unreasonable request when it’s someone you care about. It was Kisaki who used that incident to stir up unnecessary conflict, and if her intent was to drive the two apart instead of fixing their relationship, that action would truly be toxic behaviour. The kiss was a bad, impulsive idea that only happened under extreme duress, and she did try to apologise, she just didn’t know what she needed to apologise for.

The only other thing I can think of that she actually did wrong with intent was attempt to keep her relationship with Kyou a secret initially. Her reasoning was actually close to home though. Fuyuki did start avoiding her after she started dating Kyou, she just got herself a fake girlfriend to cover up what she was actually doing. In both cases, the deceptions were misguided attempts to preserve the integrity of their relationship. In that case, Fuyuki could be considered far worse than Eri.