Kono Koi wo Hoshi ni wa Negawanai - Vol. 5 Ch. 22

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Eri is a good friend who has been clawing around in the dark and bumping into objects because her friends have kept things for her for their own personal benefits, yet she's been vilified for making a mess in the dark.
I need to go back and re-read to confirm, but -

Fuyuki states here that she never confessed because she was afraid of being rejected and screwing up their friendship. But was she also influenced by watching Eri reject a confession from another girl and seeming "put off" by the idea of girls in romantic relationships?

I only ask, because that would definitely make Fuyuki's decision to never bring up her feelings that much more sympathetic, because that goes beyond what Kyou did in changing their shared dynamic - being gay, however more accepted nowadays, is still seen as "abnormal" by many people, and so if Fuyuki worried that Eri would reject not only their relationship, but Fuyuki as a person if she confessed to loving her, I think she was somewhat justified in wanting to bury that.

Maybe I'm misremembering, but that at least makes me want to try and justify Fuyuki's "keeping things from her" to some extent.
 
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I need to go back and re-read to confirm, but -

Fuyuki states here that she never confessed because she was afraid of being rejected and screwing up their friendship. But was she also influenced by watching Eri reject a confession from another girl and seeming "put off" by the idea of girls in romantic relationships?

I only ask, because that would definitely make Fuyuki's decision to never bring up her feelings that much more sympathetic, because that goes beyond what Kyou did in changing their shared dynamic - being gay, however more accepted nowadays, is still seen as "abnormal" by many people, and so if Fuyuki worried that Eri would reject not only their relationship, but Fuyuki as a person if she confessed to loving her, I think she was somewhat justified in wanting to bury that.

Maybe I'm misremembering, but that at least makes me want to try and justify Fuyuki's "keeping things from her" to some extent.
Fuyuki is not a bad person, and her being scared to confess is understandable, but it's also true that those decisions were for her benefit, which she admitted here. She says here that she was not worried about anything more than being rejected. She wanted to stay in that nebulous middle ground and wasn't courageous enough. I don't think she's terrible or anything of the sort. It's just Eri can't be blamed for what she does not know. The only person who could have clued her in chose not to for years.

Both of Eri's friends chose to alter their relationships with her, and both of them did this basically at once. Whiplash. They threw her for a loop, and the whole series, she's had to try and understand this rapidly changing landscape her two best friends have caused.

It's no wonder she's been confused and grasping--meanwhile, her friends have kept lots of information from her for their benefit. Then she gets cheated on, her male friend confesses, her female friend randomly kisses her and also confesses, while coming out as a lesbian and suddenly having a girlfriend. It's a lot for her. No one is "bad" but Eri is not the main culprit here. She's been left twirling in the wind and getting flak because she's in a yuri manga and isn't getting with the girl. I like all of them, though.
 
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Kyou is shit at being boyfriend and good at being friend. People can be like that. I honestly prefer Fuyuki to end up with Kisaki despite obvious foreshadowing of her ending up with Eri since chapter 1. Kisaki is the best girlfriend you can get. She is hot, she is kind, she is faithful and also understand about the relationship and its boundaries..
 
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Fuyuki is not a bad person, and her being scared to confess is understandable, but it's also true that those decisions were for her benefit, which she admitted here. She says here that she was not worried about anything more than being rejected. She wanted to stay in that nebulous middle ground and wasn't courageous enough. I don't think she's terrible or anything of the sort. It's just Eri can't be blamed for what she does not know. The only person who could have clued her in chose not to for years. Both of Eri's friends chose to alter their relationships with her, and both of them did this basically at once. They threw her for a loop, and the whole series, she's had to try and understand this rapidly changing landscape her two best friends have caused.
Gotcha, I must have made more of her reasoning than might have actually been in the story.

I also freely admit that I am very biased toward Fuyuki because I see facets of myself in her, in my fear of losing people and thus not sharing things of importance with them. And that has cost me relationships in the last, so I very much want to see her happy - which causes me to tunnel vision on "these other people are preventing that, therefore they are the bad guys".

And that's very much not the case, which is the beauty of this story. There are no true villains; just three good friends with a complex history and deep bonds that both heal and harm them at various points, but love one another in various ways all the same.

I will very much go back and re-read it all again in one sitting once it's all complete, because I think once I've had a chance to sit and reflect on it all, I will be able to both view the story objectively, but also immerse myself in the lives of all of the characters in a way that honors them, once I can better separate my need to build a hierarchy of them out of familiarity and unconscious need for validation of my own life experiences.

Which, being able to enjoy but also properly evaluation stories is a good faculty to have. Which is why I appreciate the forums here when people take the time to have serious dialogues about each story update.
 
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Gotcha, I must have made more of her reasoning than might have actually been in the story.
What happened in their past might have been part of what made her hesitant, so I don't think you were wrong for mentioning that. It just turns out it wasn't the most important thing for Fuyuki, based on what she confesses to here.
 
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they finally meet but i know this author will find a way to delay it another chapter. they're really good at drawing out a 5 minute conversation over 42 pages so it should be easy for them.

i knew as soon as kyou showed up that nothing would be happening lol. i'm glad they kind of made up but also i couldn't care less about him, especially after cheating, so lets move things along already
 
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What happened in their past might have been part of what made her hesitant, so I don't think you were wrong for mentioning that. It just turns out it wasn't the most important thing for Fuyuki, based on what she confesses to here.

Indeed. I have to imagine that this moment is where she would distill down everything to its essence - and ultimately, the rationale is less important than the actual choice made.
 
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It kinda shows just how shallow how Eri and Kyou's relationship when they can just instantly break it off while retaining some semblance of friendship. And this was after one party was caught cheating.
 
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Fuyuki states here that she never confessed because she was afraid of being rejected and screwing up their friendship. But was she also influenced by watching Eri reject a confession from another girl and seeming "put off" by the idea of girls in romantic relationships?
Just wanted to address the "put off" statement. Eri wasn't actually disgusted by the idea of girls in a romantic relationship. What happened was her first friend in her second year of middle school confessed after they had been friends for a while. Eri turned her down because she only thought of her as a friend. That girl then lied and told all of their classmates and clubmates that Eri called her "gross" which caused her to be ostracized for the remainder of her time in middle school. This is all from Chapter 5.
 
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Just wanted to address the "put off" statement. Eri wasn't actually disgusted by the idea of girls in a romantic relationship. What happened was her first friend in her second year of middle school confessed after they had been friends for a while. Eri turned her down because she only thought of her as a friend. That girl then lied and told all of their classmates and clubmates that Eri called her "gross" which caused her to be ostracized for the remainder of her time in middle school. This is all from Chapter 5.
I thought I remembered Eri herself using that language, but I should know by now not to trust my memory of things.

I will have to go back and re-read because I had thought her being put off was part of the reason Fuyuki was so afraid to actually confess her feelings - not just at the risk of their friendship, but because she thought it would make Eri look down on her as a person for being gay.

I will assume I did not remember correctly, rather than Fuyuki bought the lies of the rejected classmate, since I can't imagine she wouldn't believe Eri's side if she told the story differently.
 
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I thought I remembered Eri herself using that language, but I should know by now not to trust my memory of things.

I will have to go back and re-read because I had thought her being put off was part of the reason Fuyuki was so afraid to actually confess her feelings - not just at the risk of their friendship, but because she thought it would make Eri look down on her as a person for being gay.

I will assume I did not remember correctly, rather than Fuyuki bought the lies of the rejected classmate, since I can't imagine she wouldn't believe Eri's side if she told the story differently.
Fuyuki didn't believe the lies. She had full faith that while Eri can be a little insensitive, she's not one to talk to someone like that. Also, the bigger point, Fuyuki had no problem telling Eri that she was dating a girl and Eri accepted it just fine after the initial shock that Fuyuki was even dating. So the only issue that Eri has had with girls dating was her bad experience with being persona non grata for something she didn't even do.
 
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It's no wonder she's been confused and grasping--meanwhile, her friends have kept lots of information from her for their benefit. Then she gets cheated on, her male friend confesses, her female friend randomly kisses her and also confesses, while coming out as a lesbian and suddenly having a girlfriend. It's a lot for her. No one is "bad" but Eri is not the main culprit here. She's been left twirling in the wind and getting flak because she's in a yuri manga and isn't getting with the girl. I like all of them, though.
While I am ABSOLUTELY an Eri defender here, the order of operations is a bit wacked up a bit here, but also I would not say that Fuyuki kissing Eri was "random" along with her confession; Eri 'randomly' kisses her first, and the following meltdown is all based on that. She's got a lot going on and gets WAY more hate than she deserves. and people gotta stop putting her down for the sake of everyone else
 
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My problem with Eri is that she's still thinking things backwards. She met Kisaki-san and they talked about Fuyuki because Eri wanted to understand Fuyuki better, but when you think about it, she didn't learn anything about Fuyuki that she didn't already know. And more importantly, what Eri needs to understand is not Fuyuki. What she needs to understand are her own feelings. But we don't see any improvements on this front.

Now, maybe this is just the author trying to deliberately obscure her feelings to keep the resolution a mystery until the last moment. Maybe Eri has actually thought about her own feelings for Fuyuki off-screen. But we don't know that at this point and right now it just looks like she doesn't try to understand herself at all and that's pretty frustrating because the ball is most definitely on her court.
 
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What she needs to understand are her own feelings. But we don't see any improvements on this front.
I very much think that it happened off-screen post conversation with Kisaki, and I expect that's what the next chapter(or chapters) in the Planetarium with Fuyuki will reveal.
 
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Fuyuki didn't believe the lies. She had full faith that while Eri can be a little insensitive, she's not one to talk to someone like that. Also, the bigger point, Fuyuki had no problem telling Eri that she was dating a girl and Eri accepted it just fine after the initial shock that Fuyuki was even dating. So the only issue that Eri has had with girls dating was her bad experience with being persona non grata for something she didn't even do.
I'm planning on going back and re-reading the entire series again once it completes; I first found it with the posting of the previous chapter, and read the whole thing over the course of one night which has very much probably left me with not the clearest picture of all the events and thus requires a repeat read-through to fully digest everything.

That coupled with my seeing parts of myself in Fuyuki meant that I wanted to take her side in things, which very much gave me a biased view of the other characters in the story. And none of them are bad, or villains, or antagonists - not even the classmate with whom Kyou cheated on Eri with, at least in a certain sense.

Which, makes this a great story I think - each character is sympathetic and complex and there's fault in all of them, but reasons to root for their eventual happiness as well. And I'm grateful for this specific series of discussions because it's reminded me to step back more often and consider things outside of the narrow focus I sometimes adopt with manga, because of the titles I'm often reading that have a more black & white, clear-cut view of who's who in the narrative that this specific title effectively transcends.

And it's why I actually quite like this chapter, because even as Kyou did some very hurtful things to Eri and to Fuyuki at various points, it's clear that it wasn't some sadistic, malicious intent on his part wherein he was seeking to destroy their happiness. He was simply acting like a human being, in all the selfish, self-focused ways that entails, and he also stepped up and is trying to own up to the mistakes he made, while even understanding that "forgiveness" isn't something he's owed for doing so. The shared confessing to both of their faults in this chapter is refreshing to see, just from a growth standpoint that makes me want to seek out more manga like this title simply for the refreshing take on the complexity of relationships between characters that is portrayed here.

And I very much look forward to Eri and Fuyuki finally having The Talk in the coming chapter(s), because I very much want to see if they can find a path forward that sees them not have to give up the most important person in their life, if not potentially forge a deeper connection.
 
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I really hope they don't end up together but just make up. Eri has apparently never seen her in a romantic way and all her jealousy towards "senpai" came from her being Fuyuki's number 1 not from romantic feelings. I also liked Fuyuki and senpai's dynamic more but would be fine with Fuyuki maybe branching out a bit and actually looking at other people instead of only at Eri.
 
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Still a cliffhanger though that makes everything exciting, right? I don't like Kyou but at least he still cherish their friendship wishing to stay as it is since they were kids, my hands up for him on that part but the girls' end game is what I'm truly hoping to happen.
 
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I really hope they don't end up together but just make up. Eri has apparently never seen her in a romantic way and all her jealousy towards "senpai" came from her being Fuyuki's number 1 not from romantic feelings. I also liked Fuyuki and senpai's dynamic more but would be fine with Fuyuki maybe branching out a bit and actually looking at other people instead of only at Eri.
I suspect that Eri's ultimate aim is to keep Fuyuki in her life.

I think that if Eri seeks to do so by repairing their friendship, then I imagine she'd have to grapple with the fact that Fuyuki will get an actual girlfriend one day, and Eri will not always be her #1. If Eri says she can deal with that (and follow through when the time comes), I bet they can find a way through and back to more-or-less where they were before, happy as good friends again in time.

I do think though, that if she can't promise she'd be okay with that, then she might confess as a hail mary to try and hold onto Fuyuki and her position in Fuyuki's life, and maybe try to force herself to develop romantic feelings after the fact--if that's what she feels has to happen to achieve (what I perceive to be) her end goal.

Maybe my read on her endgame is off, but the constant for her has been her desire for Fuyuki to be in her life and to be Fuyuki's Special Person up to this point, to the point of causing conflict with others because of how she prioritizes Fuyuki's friendship. For that to suddenly shift would feel drastic, though maybe not impossible--but her saying "I'll let you go out of respect" feels very drastic and self-sacrificial, which doesn't strike me as Eri-like.

So assuming that goal, those feel like two very possible options for the overall point of the upcoming conversation. And then it depends on Fuyuki's thoughts on whether she wants to keep running away from Eri to avoid a decision, or try and make it work, or if it's possible at this point.
 

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