@cyand I generally get that as a stylistic choice but here so much of the dialogue reads so unnaturally in English that it really damages the flow of the chapter.
One thing I wanted to check is whether the sketchy bridges line is also part of a double entendre because it is one of the most common phrases in the chapter that reads awkwardly. Any original double meaning is also missing from the translation. You also opened up with "You have the eyes of a foreign child looking at a glistening trumpet"; which kinda flagged to people what they were in for.
Would you mind going a bit more into some of the idioms used in the chapter and where the biggest misunderstandings arise? Giving a translators note at the end of some of these tougher to understand or translate chapters can really help people reading it and also educates people in some of the nuances of the language and culture.
[edit] I definitely need an add a thank you to this post though. I really like the series and you've done a bang up job translating it.