@lapizlazuli
On
page 17, in the 2nd dialogue box, "...provides leeway by displaying path." The sentence looks strange to me as I would think that the map would display multiple paths (unless the translation just describes one path). Unless I know the exact meaning, this sentence is a bit hard to reword. I would like to say, "This Map of Akasha that I received provides leeway by displaying paths.", but the sentence still doesn't flow correctly to me. So I would go for, "This Map of Akasha that I received makes it easier to see the paths in the labyrinth." A bit longwinded, but with the information that is currently given to me, it's all I can come up with at the moment.
In the 3rd dialogue box, the sentence feels unnatural. "The routes in the lower level are wider when compared to [the] "Labyrinth of [the] Moon's Reflection." I actually liked the translation that Champion Scans had for the name of the labyrinth so I would reword it to be, "The routes in the lower level are wider when compared to the Labyrinth of the Reflected Moon".
The 4th dialogue box seems to be really out of character for Lento. "So, it surely is an easy-to-be-ganked-by-monsters labyrinth" is gamer slang and doesn't seem to fit. If this is the actual translation, then nevermind. I'd just prefer if it was reworded, but it has been a while so I may be misremembering how Lento actually speaks.
Still on page 17, the 5th dialogue box, "As for solo player losing one's focus means death." I thought this world was real life to these people, so why is he referring to himself as a "solo player"? Probably lost in translation, but as stated before, if this is the actual translation, then nevermind. I would reword it to be "As a solo player, losing one's focus means death."
Nonetheless, thanks for the translation. Try your best out there!